Comments on: The White House Wants To Buy Us A Drink

By: Dave Hughes

Dave Hughes — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 23:04:00 +0000

Let’s not be so quick to dismiss or criticize this. The reality of the business, political, and social world, is that relationship building usually takes places in venues such as this. Deals are made on the golf course, sales are enabled over expensive lunches, and networks are built at cocktail parties. Maybe this isn’t how it should be in the ideal world, but it’s how it is in the real world.

If this enables the White House people to get to know our leaders better as people and learn about us and our concerns in a more relaxed, informal setting, then I’m all for it. I see this as a bridge-building opportunity.

Do you think the Bush administration would have invited the gays over for a cocktail party under any circumstances? I think not.

Yes, it’s possible that their motivation is to schmooze us into submission. I think (or at least hope) that our leaders aren’t that gullible. And I suspect that these days, smarting from the DOMA brief and overall inaction, we are being pretty quick to view everything that happens with the suspicion of ill intent.

The journey to progress and equality travels down many paths.

By: David C.

David C. — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 07:02:38 +0000

BTW, I just read Jim Burroway’s analysis. First rate and another perspective worth evaluating in the process of forming an opinion about the whole DoJ Smelt debacle.

We need to think strategically and stop being quite so reactionary.

By: David C.

David C. — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 05:01:17 +0000

There has been a good bit of bad blood between LGBT groups and the Obama administration after the DoJ filing of the DOMA Smelt v. US brief. I'm not sure how much of it is justified. Much calmer analysis has appeared and I encourage others to evaluate it. The essential mission of gay supportive and advocacy groups is best served by those groups finding a consistent message for gay civil rights and staying on that message. That has proven to be a challenge for some time, certainly predating the Obama administration and continuing up until fairly recently. Like Prop 8, Smelt, galvanized LGBT activists and provoked a backlash against what has been perceived as abandonment by the President who had promised to be a "fierce advocate" on behalf of LGBT people in this country. The wrath spilled over like hot oil onto the entirety of the Democratic party and the DNC. The result appears to be that Democrats and the DNC along with the President have taken notice. Relationships of any kind occasionally hit rough spots. Sometimes one partner doesn't get what they think they should be getting, or there is a misunderstanding, or a promise is broken. Sometimes people just need a little time out, or a chance to express what they are really feeling. That's clearly been the case with the gay community and the Obama administration, the DNC, and Democrats in general. Now it's time to find a way to patch things up. That doesn't mean falling into the trap of co-dependency or abusive relationships. It does mean clear communication, setting boundaries, and making agreements and sticking to them. Sometimes a little social lubricant needs to be applied, and a low-key party with the right players present might help smooth the process of getting back together again. Now that a bit of the passion and heat of the moment has passed, it would be helpful to start the process of clearly articulating what is needed to put the relationship between the LGBT community and the President and his party back on a sustainable program to advance gay civil rights. If it takes a little schmoozing to work through that, then I'm all for it.

By: that_chris_guy

that_chris_guy — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 00:09:30 +0000

Odd that the President has soooo much on his plate with the economy–and therefore can’t find time to address meaningful LGBT issues–but all of a sudden finds time for a cocktail party when we threaten to take away the pink dollar.

By: Emily K

Emily K — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 23:45:58 +0000

I think it sends a bad message in another way, too. It seems to send up a clear misunderstanding – intentional, or otherwise – about the lives and lifestyles of gays. We’re not bar-hopping partiers; in fact many gay bars are dying out. And, according to most of my older gay acquaintances, the bar-hopper never constituted a majority of gays, though it was once a very visible portion of us. While the image of the cosmopolitan “twink” hitting a swanky New York social club might still pop into minds when they think of the word “homosexual,” this is absolutely not the truth when it comes to LGBT Serious Business. The way to our hearts (and minds) is not a free Seabreeze and a casual night out. We’re not any different from “normal” human beings. Many of us, in fact, don’t even enjoy drinking.

By: paul j stein

paul j stein — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 23:23:06 +0000

Maybe the HRC needs some response from contributors. Holding back funding would get the message across fast, very fast. Voting with cash restraint works with everyone!

By: Lindoro Almaviva

Lindoro Almaviva — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 23:14:55 +0000

Great point. I would not impressed if the people that are supposed to defend us are cozying up with the ones that just 2 weeks ago were backstabbing us.

If the Washington closet cases need a place to cruise then let them go to a bar or a park like the rest of the people.