Comments on: The inhumanity of “protecting marriage”

By: CPT_Doom

CPT_Doom — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 21:54:30 +0000

After 9/11 a local paper, IIRC, in Kentucky did the same thing – Ronald Gamboa and Dan Brandhorst were travelling with their son David on United 175. Brandhorst’s hometown paper initially listed him as single, not mentioning his partner or son. It was his blood family who protested, and the paper updated its story to reflect the truth. Too bad the state of Missouri couldn’t have the same heart.

By: anteros

anteros — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 07:50:58 +0000

sickening. absolutely sickening. what would it take for people to open their eyes and stop their hate? i’m so upset and disgusted.

hugs and condolences to Kelly and their kid.

By: Regan DuCasse

Regan DuCasse — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 20:12:59 +0000

The anti marriage quality folks hate to hear about stories like this. They think it ‘unfairly’ taps emotion and sympathy and exploits tragedy.
Right.

It’s FAR more important and especially a compassionate way to elicit emotional feelings for this trooper, his surviving partner AND the son they raised together, than raising HOSTILE and FEAR INDUCING EMOTIONS.

What IS a better way to make the public feel something FOR these two men?
Decent, hardworking PARENTS, as well as an officer, killed in the line of duty.
Emotional responses FOR THEM?
In FAVOR of them having the CHOICE to marry?

Or feeling emotions AGAINST them as if their lives, what they done for their community, is sinister, less than or in any way, threatening to what’s good for society?

The hypocrisy and depth of resentment for what gay people want the public to know and feel about them is mind boggling.
It really is.

Unlike opposite sex boyfriends and girlfriends, the choice NOT to marry is strictly in THEIR HANDS.
They could if they wanted to, and if they don’t, and aren’t concerned with the federal or state benefits of being married, that’s ENTIRELY up to them.

So for any pension board or so on to speak to a gay couple in such a way for denying benefits, is cruel because it ISN’T the fault of the couple NOR their choice that they weren’t married.

Just as arguing that being gay is a casual choice made or that could be, treating gay couples as if marriage is a choice too, salts wounds.

Thanks for letting me vent.
I really HATE crap like this.

By: Maurice Lacunza

Maurice Lacunza — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 19:17:31 +0000

Well, I sent an email to: mshppied@mshp.dps.mo.gov
which is the information and public education office of the Missouri State Patrol. I stated that the treatment of this man was not honorable.

Sometimes I get a bit scared to use my real name for fear of retaliation. But if the editors of BTB can do it, so can I. And, for the rights of the Trooper and the rights of all of us, I am willing to put my name on my letter.

By: Stormy

Stormy — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 17:27:56 +0000

I hope it’s okay to post this here–there was a Memorial Eucharist at Christ Church Cathedral yesterday:

Honoring a Gay Missouri Hero
St. Louis Community remembers Dennis E. Engelhard

On Christmas Day Missouri Highway Patrolman Dennis Engelhard was struck and killed while assisting at an accident in Eureka, Missouri. Burial services were conducted as per family wishes in early January with internment at Christ Church Cathedral in Saint Louis. Engelhard is survived by his partner of nearly 15 years, Kelly Glossip. Mr. Glossip is also a member of Christ Church Cathedral.

Show Me No Hate is asking for the entire community to attend this special memorial event. Many of the rights afforded by marriage would of guaranteed the future of Engelhard’s spouse Kelly and their son. Missouri State employee benefits are not extended to same-sex couples. Imagine the tragedy of losing your spouse and then being forced to burden the expenses of moving on. And what’s particularly troubling is that without Federally protected same-sex marriage, family members can still override the grieving partner’s wishes.

In the spirit of obtaining 100% Marriage Equality, please help us remember Engelhard and all those LGBT Missouri State employees who are not able to extend their State benefits to their spouses and children.

At 2 pm, Saturday, January 30, 2010 Christ Church Cathedral will hold a Memorial Eucharist to celebrate the life of Dennis Engelhard, with a reception following around 3pm open to family and friends.

A Memorial Fund has been established in his honor to support Kelly and his son. You may send contributions to:

The Dennis Engelhard Memorial Fund
c/o Christ Church Cathedral
1210 Locust St
Saint Louis, MO 63101

The Very Rev. Michael Kinman notes, “Dennis was a vital part of our Cathedral community, as is his partner, Kelly. We have lost a dear friend and a community hero. Unfortunately, Dennis’ death has also served to remind us of the staggering lack of legal protections and benefits accorded to gay and lesbian couples and of our need to work for those protections and benefits so that future survivors don’t have their grief compounded by the indignity and practical hardships brought on by this discrimination.”

http://showmenohate.blogspot.com/

By: Burr

Burr — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 16:24:07 +0000

It’s one thing that the law discriminates against them, but to completely pretend that he had no lover and no son is just being vindictive and hateful on top of it. There is no reason they had to do that and rub salt in the wound. How “Christian” of them..

By: Richard Rush

Richard Rush — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 16:12:41 +0000

I'm pleased to realize that we get far more support from atheists than we do from those who proudly wear "Christian" on their sleeves. I know, I know: Many Christians support us, and many gays are Christians. But virtually 100% of our organized opposition is motivated by and/or justified by Christianity.

By: Christopher Waldrop

Christopher Waldrop — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 14:39:49 +0000

To add to what Rachael just said, and as someone in an opposite-sex marriage, I feel I have to speak up. To put it simply, I support marriage equality. There is no reason that I can think of why Glossip and Engelhard should have been treated any differently from any other couple. As has been noted elsewhere, if they’d been a heterosexual couple who’d only met and been married a short time before this wouldn’t be an issue. These men spent fifteen years building a life together. There’s no excuse for callously dismissing that.

The argument I hear again and again that existing marriages are “threatened” by equality. The truth is that it’s the lack of equality that’s the threat. If Glossip and Engelhard’s relationship can be treated so callously, if what they shared can be dismissed so easily, that reflects poorly on all marriages.

By: dave

dave — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 14:19:00 +0000

These people and their made up god are sick. They say god says marriage is between a man and a woman. God also said, according to what they made up, no divorce. They changed that so now you can get divorced and still marry in the church. They made up no meat on Fridays. That’s too much trouble for us too, we want meat so lets change that. God says go to church on Sunday. That’s too much trouble, we have things to do on Sunday, lets change that. How many other things can you think of that god said was the rule and they couldn’t follow it because it was too much trouble for them. I remember as a kid you couldn’t go into another faith’s church. They just make everything up to suit themselves and now they have the nerve to try to protect marriage for themselves. The sad thing is when they die they won’t be punished for being hipocrites and liars because there’s no god because they made him up. They’re ruining people’s lives with their voodoo. If that’s what they believe, just shut up and do it and stop inflicting it on others. Religion is like masterbating, you want to do it, go do it in the corner where I can’t see it.

By: Sarah

Sarah — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 13:55:03 +0000

I’m crying too. It’s positively unconscionable that people have to live their lives this way; in complete fragility and illegitimacy simply because they’re not “the norm.” It’s as though as a society we’re telling GLBT people “Fine, if you want to live ‘that life,’ you’ll have to work harder, give as much or more, and then ultimately lose it all when (not if) something happens. It’s not as if you two were married after all.”