I know the likelihood of gays in polygamist cultures is the same as in the “real” world. But, I have no proof nor can I cite any scientific sources for my hypothesis.

Thanks for sharing your story. I wish a much wider audience could read it. Unfortunately, those who most need to read it, such as Dan, are so devoid of human empathy and understanding that they would encourage you to return to living a miserable life. And you should be happy to do it because your responsibility in life is to satisfy THEM. They are pathological busybodies.

Everything is always exclusively about THEM, about catering to THEIR needs, and about us recognizing THEIR uniquely superior qualifications and authority to have dominion over everyone else. Essentially, they are very needy, and like all needy people, they drain the life out of everyone around them.

I wish the best for you, Rich.

Growing up believing your parents wouldn’t love you if they knew the truth about you is as about as discouraging someone from choosing to be gay as I can imagine. It also directly lead to a 20 year addiction to opiate pain killers which started when I was 17 because they numbed the mental and emotional pain of being gay convinced my parents wouldn’t have anything to do with me if they knew (when I did tell them they were more or less accepting and have grown over the years to be very accepting), but the main reason I liked the opiate pain killers so much when I was a teen was because they made me feel like a different person, I hated myself so much at the time since I believed all the anti-gay lies I was exposed to and there was no internet or any media to give me a different perception of being gay. However I am somewhat grateful to my addiction at such a young age because if not for it I would have likely killed myself, I had tried several times before discovering the “wonder” of pills, they destroyed my life in some ways but they gave me a break from all the intense mental and emotional pain which allowed me to endure. I’m going on 3 years clean now and on methadone while I try to recover the rest of my life. Why would I have gone through all that if I had a choice in the matter? Nowadays I’m a very proud and out gay man who wouldn’t change his orientation if he could in spite of the pain and suffering caused by all the anti-gay crap I was exposed to in my younger days, its taken a long time and lot of work for me to get to this point though but I believe its made me a better person, more compassionate and understanding of others and more willing to take a stand for what I know to be right and true.

Some people like Dan are never going to understand others, while normally I’d say its best to just ignore them such debate as above I believe is very good and healthy for gay/lesbian young folks to read and hear so they can understand the truth about themselves and learn how to spot and counter anti-gay bigotry.

Also Tommy has a very good point concerning drug laws, the US has more of its citizens in prison than any other country in the world on a per capita basis. So many of those in prison are there because of ridiculously harsh drug laws where the punishment is no way comparable to the crime. I’m Canadian so not up to speed on recent developments in US drug laws but from what I understand there’s a move towards making punishments more reasonable while at the same time in Canada our Conservative PM Harper is pushing through ridiculously tough drug laws much like the US has or used to have in some cases. The facts and scientific research doesn’t support longer sentences but much like people like Dan ignore the scientific research on same-sex parenting our PM ignores the science on drug regulations and other crime and punishment issues. There’s a huge expansion of our prison system underway to make room for the massive influx of new prisoners from all of Harper’s changes to our laws, having so much more of our population imprisoned is likely going to have a very negative social effect and will likely lead to a permanent criminal underclass.

What is it about conservatives and their followers that make them ignore science to rely on their gut feeling instead?

not to mention that Roman empire continued on for another 800 years after its alleged fall in the form of Byzantium, which itself was seriously weakened by the crusaders passing through and pillaging like there was no tomorrow, thus setting it up for the conquest by the ottomans.

first: good catch, Priya. You may well be right aobut who Dan really is. He may also be a certain John B. donovan. Only Dan/Louis/John know for sure. Personally, if this is the case, I don’t see how anyone could live with that kind of duplicity, but then I’ve also never understood the mindset that says whatever you do to people you don’t like is justified by your good intentions towards them, even if by good you mean “I wish you’d all shut up and die.”

Dan’s assumptions are legion, starting with:

1. gay is bad, straight is good.

2. gay is inferior, straight is superior, and naturally so. Gay people are always going to be damaged goods.

3. All men are the same, all women are the same, and this was ordained by someone or other.

4. Men and women are completely different.

5. Sex, gender, and orientation are not only exactly the same things, except when they aren’t, but are immutable, except when they aren’t, and determinant, except when they aren’t.

And my favorite:

All of history can be boiled down to the difference between the sexually pure and the sexually impure. Sexual immorality caused the fall of Rome, and is causing the downfall of america.