Comments on: Masturbation is Satan’s Plot to Silence the Church Forever

By: Ben in Oakland

Ben in Oakland — Thu, 04 Oct 2012 11:13:44 +0000

First, that’s UP Gyllenhal lane.

second, subject verb disagreement, assuming not a typo by BTB agents of Satan, is indeed a sign of the end times.

and masturbation is an age old system? Do you mean there are rules, regulations, government?

Greetings, BTW, from Chile.

jerry — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 16:24:47 +0000

Hey, nobody has mentioned orgies. That ought to set the hair on fire of the New Independent Christian party.

We can watch them sizzle.

Patrick Hogan — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 04:37:28 +0000

Masturbation and homosexuality silence the church? So jerking off to gay porn counts double, right?

I don’t know if it works, but I suppose I’ll head off and start shushing the pope, so to speak.

Edwin in Colorado — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 01:12:59 +0000

I guess all the straight that jack off are going to join satan too?

Ryan — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 00:04:44 +0000

“Stray down Gyllenhaal lane.” Holy crap, that’s awesome. I *really* want that to become a new euphemism. We’ve got to male it catch on, people!

F Young — Tue, 02 Oct 2012 23:17:50 +0000

Just what we need, extreme right-wing parties for right wing extremists to waste their vote on…

…and get a Democrat elected in a swing riding!

More power to them!

tristram — Tue, 02 Oct 2012 19:27:02 +0000

I’m guessing that the whole thing about the NICP is sourced to Onion via the FARS Iranian new agency?

Snowman — Tue, 02 Oct 2012 18:59:50 +0000

Things that make you go “Huh?”

Raybob — Tue, 02 Oct 2012 18:42:53 +0000

Step 2: Refer to step 1