Jodi Foster is the largest contibutor to the Trevor Project in it’s entire history, one would think that would suffice. And to now claim you were not being a bully about your view, then why the quote marksed “glass closeted” crap? By any standards, Ms Foster and Mr. Garber were in fact “OUT” and NOT in a glass clsoet. Your statement certainly was not a supportive one, and I notice you don’t answer my question on if YOU made an “It Get’s Better” video. I always find it suspect when one suggests others do things they themselves don’t do. No, you are not a celbrity, but your own video could help someone too, in fact I think the videos made by non-famous individuals does more good than those by celebrities. It’s always more comforting to know regular ordinary individuals like ourselves are out there too. (and it is funny that you said you didn’t want them to use a megaphone, but then go on to sugest they do just that by making a video.).

If that makes me a bullying, christianist, Gay PC policeman, so be it.

Well that all might make sense if Jodi Foster had not already come out in 2007, and if Garber hadn’t already mentioned his partner and attends award shows with him as his date.

Jodi Foster has been private about EVERYTHING in her life, and if you read Jim’s article on her you would see she has good reason, not many people have someone try to kill a President for them, or track them down to their college home.

AND, it is NOT the press that’s dogging these people, it’s other gay people saying these people just are not out enough by their standards. Funny how we recently celebrated the fact that Kyle XY star Matt Dallas came out in a tweet announcing his engagement, Matt Boomer came out in a speech (just like Foster did in 2007) and Zachary QUinto came out subtly in a magazine interview. All three of those people were celebratede for their “casual” manner in comming out.

What we have here is a demand by average gays that gay celbrities come out when WE want them to, not when they feel it appropriate for their lives. I got to choose the timing when I came out, presumably most of us do. And I think it is a shame that so many gay people are now bullying people who do come out as not having doen it in the proper way. Your assertion that it’s “the media” is a false one. Unless tristram is a reporter in disguise, my post was in reply to an every day gay, not a person in the media. Foster has been out for at lest 5 years, Garber for longer. These are people who live their lives gay every day. Foster lived with her ex for years, driving matching cars and totting their kids around. Just an ordianry gay life, just like a lot of gay people, she lives her life and that’s the type of equality I have been fighting for for years.

It is morally unfair to call on people to come out for OUR reasons, and not allow them to come out for THEIR reasons. These gay actors are OUT, and it should not matter to you, or Tristram or anyone else how or why they are, it should suffice that they ARE.

And it is incredibly disingenuous for people like Garber, or more pointedly Jodie Foster, to argue that they are already out, they just “don’t talk about it.” Well even the most private celebrities still acknowledge their wives/husbands if they are straight. Daniel Craig may refuse to answer questions about his marriage, but he doesn’t deny he is married or refuse to be photographed with her at public events. Now, it does appear Garber has been more open about his relationship than Foster was, but the principle is the same.

If you really want a definition of how “out” someone has to be to be far enough “out,” that might be a good measure. If the celebrity treats their private life in exactly the same way as a straight celebrity would in the same circumstances, then they are “out” enough.

Have YOU made an “It get’s Better” video? If so , good on you, if not, why should someone else make one if YOU won’t?

How “out” must one be to satisfy people? Does Garber have to wear an “I’m Gay!!” shirt everywhere or can his casual remarks about his partner be enough?

Personally, I’m kind of tired of this new Gay PC Police thing, with all these people telling other gay people how to “properly” be gay and out.

It is not p to us, any one of us, to decide for any other individual what, when or how it is appropriate to be “out”.

I did not like the religous right telling me how to be a good christian american anymore than I like you or others telling me what makes a person a “good” or “acceptable” gay. This is getting dangerously close to being AFA or NOM telling us exactly what we have to do in order to be acceptable to the American public…

So, now it’s bullying people into making anti-bullying videos to “prove” their gayness….If you don’t see the irony, then you are blind.

And Victor Garber? *sigh* Jesus . . . (in “Godspell”) and Anthony (the young sailor) in the original “Sweeney Todd.” Stunning then – damn handsome now. *swoons just a little*