Box Turtle Bulletin

Box Turtle BulletinNews, analysis and fact-checking of anti-gay rhetoric
“Now you must raise your children up in a world where that union of man and box turtle is on the same legal footing as man and wife…”
This article can be found at:
Latest Posts

Posts for December, 2014

Breaking news: box of rocks will run for presidency in 2016

Timothy Kincaid

December 10th, 2014

The box of rocks has been silent for the past two years after winning no votes in the 2012 GOP presidential primary. A spokesman for the box explained that most people just think the box is dumb and there’s not much use in debating the point.

But now we hear that Rick Santorum will be running again for the Republican nomination, and he’s proved time and again to be dumber than a box of rocks. So far, he’s off to a great start. (WaPo)

Reflecting on how a presidential campaign could be different this time around, Santorum said: “We’re just obviously in a better place right now. Our message will be a lot more focused this time than it was last time.”

Well, obviously!

For now the box is not responding; but the spokesman assures us that if Santorum runs again then the box of rocks will reignite it’s campaign, and the box is sure to benefit by comparison.

The People We’ll Never Reach

Rob Tisinai

December 8th, 2014

What I say:

My husband and I went to a gay charity event for L.A. Children’s Hospital, and it was lovely to see all the clothes and toys this group of good people had brought to the party.

What they hear:

My SatanSatanSatan! and I went to a SatanSatanSatan! for L.A. Children’s Hospital and it was lovely to see all the clothes and toys this SatanSatanSatan! had brought to the SatanSatanSatan!

Bonus distortion:

More proof that homosexuals (SatanSatanSatan!) are obsessed with children.

No Christmas nuptials for Mississippi

Timothy Kincaid

December 4th, 2014

Alas, before the stay issued by Judge Carlton Reeves expired on his ruling overturning Mississippi’s ban on same-sex marriage, the Tenth Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals extended the stay. So there will be no same-sex marriages in that state this year.

However, the wait is not interminable. The Tenth Fifth Circuit is scheduled on January 9th to hear oral arguments on similar rulings from Texas (favorable) and Louisiana (unfavorable). Assuming it makes its determination shortly thereafter, it is likely that this ruling will also apply in short order to Mississippi.

Marriage in Florida in January?

Timothy Kincaid

December 3rd, 2014

Florida couples, set your calendars.

In July, Miami-Dade Circuit Judge Sarah Zabel found that the state’s ban on same-sex marriage was a violation of the US Constitution. That ruling was put on hold until July January 5, 2015, in order to give the state time to appeal.

The state appealed to the Eleventh Circuit Court of Appeals and also asked that the circuit court extend the stay on the ruling until such time as the appeal could be heard and determined.

Equality Florida is now reporting:

The 11th Circuit U.S. Court of Appeals has denied the state’s motion to extend the stay, which means Judge Hinkle’s stay expires end of day on January 5th and marriages begin!

The state may now request an extension of the stay from the Supreme Court. Barring that unlikely event, marriages will begin in the first week on the new year in the Sunshine State.

Federal judge finds Missouri ban unconstitutional

Timothy Kincaid

November 7th, 2014

A few days ago a state judge found Missouri’s anti-gay marriage ban to be a violation of the US Constitution. The ruling is under appeal at the state Supreme Court, but is not stayed in the interim.

Today a federal judge, Ortrie D Smith, has come to the same conclusion.

Smith has stayed the Federal ruling until it passes appeal, but the state ruling continues to allow for marriage licenses to be issued. There is some uncertainty as to whether the state ruling applies to the entire state, but at present those Missouri couples wishing to marry may get their license in St. Louis and have it recognized throughout the state.

In Other News — Sun Rises, NOM Takes Credit

Jim Burroway

November 5th, 2014

NOM puffs its chest over yesterday’s elections:

“Marriage won an overwhelming victory last night,” said Brian Brown, president of NOM. “In red states and blue, candidates who supported marriage as the union of one man and one woman won election and those who didn’t were rejected by voters. The Republican Party should take note that their nominees who favored gay ‘marriage’ were opposed by NOM and they were resoundingly defeated.”

A Prediction

Rob Tisinai

November 4th, 2014

A hundred years from now, Christians will proudly recall how they fought for LGBT rights at the beginning of the 21st Century, and if anyone reminds them of Christian opposition to our equality, they will reply, “But that was a FALSE Christianity!” So it happened with slavery, so it will happen with gays.

Welcome Out, Tim Cook

Jim Burroway

October 30th, 2014

Tim CookThe fact that he’s gay is probably one of the worst kept secrets — if, indeed, it ever was a secret. The Apple CEO has rarely spoken about anything other than Apple. Unlike his predecessor, Steve Jobs, whose persona and that of Apple’s was one and the same, Tim Cook has always been one to stand back and keep the focus on Apple and its products. That probably won’t change a whole lot, but this morning, in an essay for Businessweek, Cook removed whatever wisps of ambiguity that may still be out there:

While I have never denied my sexuality, I haven’t publicly acknowledged it either, until now. So let me be clear: I’m proud to be gay, and I consider being gay among the greatest gifts God has given me.

Being gay has given me a deeper understanding of what it means to be in the minority and provided a window into the challenges that people in other minority groups deal with every day. It’s made me more empathetic, which has led to a richer life. It’s been tough and uncomfortable at times, but it has given me the confidence to be myself, to follow my own path, and to rise above adversity and bigotry. It’s also given me the skin of a rhinoceros, which comes in handy when you’re the CEO of Apple.

The world has changed so much since I was a kid. America is moving toward marriage equality, and the public figures who have bravely come out have helped change perceptions and made our culture more tolerant. Still, there are laws on the books in a majority of states that allow employers to fire people based solely on their sexual orientation. There are many places where landlords can evict tenants for being gay, or where we can be barred from visiting sick partners and sharing in their legacies. Countless people, particularly kids, face fear and abuse every day because of their sexual orientation.

I don’t consider myself an activist, but I realize how much I’ve benefited from the sacrifice of others. So if hearing that the CEO of Apple is gay can help someone struggling to come to terms with who he or she is, or bring comfort to anyone who feels alone, or inspire people to insist on their equality, then it’s worth the trade-off with my own privacy.

Earlier this week, Cook was in his home state of Alabama where he was being inducted into the Alabama Academy of Honor. In his acceptance speech, he challenged Alabama for its slowness to grant equality to everyone: “As a state, we took too long to steps toward equality. We were too slow on equality for African-Americans. We were too slow on interracial marriage, and we are still too slow for the equality for the LGBT community.”

Arizona edges closer to equality

Timothy Kincaid

October 16th, 2014

Today was the deadline for parties to submit their briefs arguing whether or not the Ninth’s Circuit’s ruling on marriage equality applies to the state of Arizona. Attorney General Tom Horne seems to concede that it does. (AZCentral)

The state’s brief argument concedes that the 9th Circuit ruling would apply to Arizona, but says Sedwick should wait to issue his ruling until the 9th Circuit issues a mandate. The mandate is essentially a technical document telling the courts to go forward with the opinion. The 9th Circuit issued a mandate within hours of its original ruling but withdrew it so Idaho could appeal. That appeal is concluded but the 9th Circuit has not yet reissued the mandate.

Plan your Brokeback marriage

Timothy Kincaid

October 16th, 2014

Wyoming, home of the fictional Brokeback Mountain, may get marriage equality as early as Monday. (Casper Star Tribune)

Acknowledging his order could have grave consequences if incorrect, U.S. District Judge Scott W. Skavdahl plans to issue an order by Monday in a case that could legalize same-sex marriage in Wyoming.

The judge said he would consider the arguments and examine a few more issues before making a decision because “the impact of this court’s ruling if incorrect” could have grave consequences. Skavdahl said he would issue his ruling by 5 p.m. Monday.

Alaska gets two day stay

Timothy Kincaid

October 15th, 2014

The State of Alaska asked for a stay to its marriage ruling. And by astonishing odds, two of the Ninth Circuit’s most conservative judges, Diarmuid O’Scannlain and Jay Bybee, were on the three judge panel deciding the matter. O’Scannlain and Bybee were two of the three judges who would have given Proposition 8 an en banc hearing.

However, things were different this time around.

Bybee sided with judge Marsha Berzon in denying stay at the Ninth Circuit level and in issuing a temporary two day stay for the state to appeal to the Supreme Court in hopes of getting a more permanent stay.

Which means that marriages will not begin first thing tomorrow in The Last Frontier, but rather at noon on Friday.

North Carolina high school bans play because Teh Ghey

Timothy Kincaid

October 15th, 2014

almost

You’ve never been to Maiden, North Carolina, but your selfies probably have. It’s the home of Apple’s Cloud data center.

It’s also home of some pretty nasty prejudice. (GayStarNews)

The school’s principal, Rob Bliss, has released a statement surrounding the outrage.

He said: ‘In regards to the request for students to perform the play “Almost Maine,” careful review and consideration was given to the contents of this play.

‘The play contained sexually-explicit overtones and multiple sexual innuendos that are not aligned with our mission and educational objectives.

‘As principal of Maiden High School, I have an obligation to ensure that all material, including drama performances is appropriate and educationally sound for students of all ages.’

And, by “appropriate and educationally sound for students of all ages”, Bliss means “ain’t got none of Teh Gheys!!”

Almost, Maine is a play containing nine vignettes about love and loss. And yes, stories about love and loss can have “overtones” and “innuendos” that reference sex. Read Shakespeare.

But Almost, Maine is no worse than prime time television and downright tame compared to pretty much any music video. And that isn’t, of course, what got Principal Bliss all in a tither. The play’s real crime is that one of the nine vignettes includes two men who say they love each other.

And while Almost, Maine is sufficiently age appropriate that in 2010, it was “the most-produced play in North American high schools“, it’s just too scandalous for places where attitudes like those of Principal Bliss prevail.

The drama students are hoping that a petition can pressure Principal Bliss into allowing them to perform the play and, consequently, their program to survive.

Ron Hart on marriage

Timothy Kincaid

October 14th, 2014

I seldom read something on Christian Post and do anything but shudder. Today I chuckled:

Neither government nor citizens should waste time and energy trying to keep two loving, consenting, committed people from a public acknowledgment of their union. If we were to have a law against allowing a subset of our country to marry, it should be directed squarely at the Kardashians.

Is a couple of lady gym teachers with three cats and a joint checking account really a threat? Are two guys living in a once-blighted neighborhood that becomes gentrified with fixed-up homes and where, before you know it, bistros and bakeries pop up, a problem? How is that damaging to America? Who else is going to adopt twin Chinese girls? Madonna and Angelina Jolie can’t take them all.

Marriage at the top of the world

Timothy Kincaid

October 14th, 2014

barrow weddingsAlthough Alaska state law requires a three day wait, Magistrate Mary Treiber waived the requirement and allowed two lesbian couples to marry. Which is a pleasant little story.

But perhaps more interesting is where this happened, the town of Barrow.

Barrow is the northernmost city in the United States, lying above the Arctic Circle and just 1,300 south of the North Pole. The population is less than 5,000.

Congratulations, ladies.

(ktuu.com)

Updated marriage map

Timothy Kincaid

October 13th, 2014

marriage 2014

Dark Purple – marriage licenses issued to same-sex couples
Light Purple – states in circuits which have ruled for marriage equality
Pink – recognizes legal marriages conducted elsewhere

It is now possible to drive from Chicago to LA without ever becoming “not married” along the way.

Older Posts