John Smid’s Vagina Monologue

Jim Burroway

February 19th, 2008

I’ve wanted to post about this ever since I attended the Exodus Freedom Conference last summer. But to be perfectly honest, I was so flabbergasted by Love In Action Director John Smid’s workshop on masturbation that I was never able to figure out how to approach it.

Watch this, especially at the point about halfway through the video when he talks about respecting his wife while talking about her vagina. When someone like this projects so many of his issues onto everyone else, do you think he’s qualified to teach anyone about sexuality?

So now that you’ve heard that, read the rules that the residential clients at Love In Action are expected to follow. It takes your breath away, doesn’t it?


February 20th, 2008

As a life-long lover of classical music, I was particularly intrigued by this Love In Action regulation:

“No…listening to secular media of any kind, anywhere within the client’s and the parent’s/guardian’s control. This includes listening to classical or instrumental music that is not expressly Christian (Beethoven, Bach, etc. are not considered Christian).”

I suppose you can never really be too careful; some of these classical composers were gay themselves, weren’t they? Take Handel, for instance. Ellen Harris, the professor of music at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, claims that she can deduce Handel’s homosexuality from his music. So his “Messiah” may be full of subliminal, auditory, homosexual messages. Just consider how your same-sex attraction could be reinforced by listening to “Comfort ye, my people” – especially if it’s sung by a sexy-voiced tenor. It doesn’t bear thinking about, does it?

Ben in Oakland

February 20th, 2008

Two posts right next to each other–vagina monolog and harming parents– truly illustrate has sick this whole thing is.

Fear and fascination, intertwined so tightly and bound so closely by knots of religious gobbledegook.

Tell us your deepest and darkest secrets so that we can get off on them and you can be shamed eternally into giving us even more money. You do it so that i can keep my thoughts totally on what underwear i’m wearing.


Emily K

February 20th, 2008

How is Bach not Christian?? He wrote “Jesu Joy!” WTF??? His job was to write Canons and pieces for the church! This is ridiculous. This all goes along with the twisted belief that Catholics aren’t Christians.

Ben in Oakland

February 20th, 2008

Emily, I have to disagree with you there. I think that hte prohibition comes from the idea that THIS world is sick and dirty, and that anything that keeps your mind on this world– including beauty in music, which is sensuality, thus a doorway to sin– is bad.

Same old puritan BS, the cultural equivalent of a hairshirt or flagellation.

It’s just sick.

Willie Hewes

February 20th, 2008

People, enough about the music, did you not hear the creepy man talking about vagina? Holy… mother of all things holy!

That was way, way creepy. You should put a warning on that video Jim, it could be seriously damaging to someone’s erotic potential, at least temporarily.

Never masturbate. Don’t look at yourself in a mirror. Don’t touch yourself ‘down there’. Yea, let’s teach ourself fear and ignorance, it’s surely the way to heaven.

Very sad.

Daniel Gonzales

February 20th, 2008

No tight underwear either don’t forget.

Regan DuCasse

February 20th, 2008

Give up my sports bras?! Oh…HELL no!
And the one about Handel, just kill me now!
Why don’t they just sign up sheep or puppies? Those are the actual kinds of living things they want to engage at this camp, not real people.

quo III

February 20th, 2008

About those Love in Action rules – I was bemused to see that they insist men in the program must be clean shaven. Men’s facial hair is one of the things that distinguishes them from women, so wouldn’t it be more logical to make it compulsory?

Craig L. Adams

February 22nd, 2008

Yes. This is disturbed, disturbing and bizarre. Thanks for posting this, Jim.


February 22nd, 2008

The whole thing is incoherent.

As Jim points out gays are probably around what—4 percent of the population? If there was a direct link between masturbation and homosexuality the percentage would be somewhere closer to what—98% or higher? We’d own the world.

Are these people really asserting that only around 4 percent of the population masturbates? Are they that divorced from their own bodies? How dismal.

Do they imagine the multi-billion dollar porn industry is supported by just the 4 percent of the population that is gay?

Who’s buying/renting all those hetero-porn DVDs and “toys” and what do they imagine those people do with them?

Tight underware? LOL. If that was true most all of the men in Europe and Latin America would be gay.

How could anybody listen to this man and not conclude that he was either a con-artist or in profound need of help himself?

It seems so obvious that these groups prey on people who are under duress. No one in a lucid frame of mind and who has a broader/informed frame of reference on matters sexual could possibly find any of this credible.

Emily K

February 22nd, 2008

I don’t think they’re saying masturbation directly causes homosexuality – I think they believe masturbation is a deviant sexual act (or at least “chronic” masturbation is) and that will lead naturally to OTHER “deviant” sexual activities, like homosexuality. Basically if a human can be led “astray” sexually in one way, they can be led astray sexually in all ways.

Priya lynn

February 23rd, 2008

Emily, I’ve heard fundamentalists make exactly that argument that masturbation causes gayness. The say masturbation is a same sex act so once you start masturbating you are engaging in gayness.


February 23rd, 2008

Yes, Priya lynn, you’re right. Tim LaHaye states that early and heavy masturbation is one of the causes of homosexuality in his trashy and pernicious book “What Everyone Should Know about Homosexuality” (formerly entitled “The Unhappy Gays”). Exactly how early he didn’t say, nor did he specify how often you have to do it for it to count as “heavy”.

I think Jim’s observation that the trick patently doesn’t work for the vast majority of people in America (or anywhere else, for that matter) is ample refutation. But I suppose some could always argue – or speculate – that it causes homosexuality only if you do it more than x times per week.

Emily K

February 23rd, 2008

I can’t believe fundies would take THAT BIZARRE a view of masturbation. do they seriously think that everyone who masturbates is doing so to a same sex fantasy? that is so stilted and odd.


February 24th, 2008

On the other hand, one of NARTH’s documents, “Adolescent Homosexuality” by Dr. Sander Breiner, suggests “[t]he total absence of masturbation or late onset of masturbation with no manifest heterosexual interests” as a possible indicator of “Teen Homosexual Problems”.


March 30th, 2008

Comment deleted due to obscenity. All comments are subject to our comments policy.

Leave A Comment

All comments reflect the opinions of commenters only. They are not necessarily those of anyone associated with Box Turtle Bulletin. Comments are subject to our Comments Policy.

(Required, never shared)

PLEASE NOTE: All comments are subject to our Comments Policy.


Latest Posts

The Things You Learn from the Internet

"The Intel On This Wasn't 100 Percent"

From Fake News To Real Bullets: This Is The New Normal

NC Gov McCrory Throws In The Towel

Colorado Store Manager Verbally Attacks "Faggot That Voted For Hillary" In Front of 4-Year-Old Son

Associated Press Updates "Alt-Right" Usage Guide

A Challenge for Blue Bubble Democrats

Baptist Churches in Dallas, Austin Expelled Over LGBT-Affirming Stance

Featured Reports

What Are Little Boys Made Of?

In this original BTB Investigation, we unveil the tragic story of Kirk Murphy, a four-year-old boy who was treated for “cross-gender disturbance” in 1970 by a young grad student by the name of George Rekers. This story is a stark reminder that there are severe and damaging consequences when therapists try to ensure that boys will be boys.

Slouching Towards Kampala: Uganda’s Deadly Embrace of Hate

When we first reported on three American anti-gay activists traveling to Kampala for a three-day conference, we had no idea that it would be the first report of a long string of events leading to a proposal to institute the death penalty for LGBT people. But that is exactly what happened. In this report, we review our collection of more than 500 posts to tell the story of one nation’s embrace of hatred toward gay people. This report will be updated continuously as events continue to unfold. Check here for the latest updates.

Paul Cameron’s World

In 2005, the Southern Poverty Law Center wrote that “[Paul] Cameron’s ‘science’ echoes Nazi Germany.” What the SPLC didn”t know was Cameron doesn’t just “echo” Nazi Germany. He quoted extensively from one of the Final Solution’s architects. This puts his fascination with quarantines, mandatory tattoos, and extermination being a “plausible idea” in a whole new and deeply disturbing light.

From the Inside: Focus on the Family’s “Love Won Out”

On February 10, I attended an all-day “Love Won Out” ex-gay conference in Phoenix, put on by Focus on the Family and Exodus International. In this series of reports, I talk about what I learned there: the people who go to these conferences, the things that they hear, and what this all means for them, their families and for the rest of us.

Prologue: Why I Went To “Love Won Out”
Part 1: What’s Love Got To Do With It?
Part 2: Parents Struggle With “No Exceptions”
Part 3: A Whole New Dialect
Part 4: It Depends On How The Meaning of the Word "Change" Changes
Part 5: A Candid Explanation For "Change"

The Heterosexual Agenda: Exposing The Myths

At last, the truth can now be told.

Using the same research methods employed by most anti-gay political pressure groups, we examine the statistics and the case studies that dispel many of the myths about heterosexuality. Download your copy today!

And don‘t miss our companion report, How To Write An Anti-Gay Tract In Fifteen Easy Steps.

Testing The Premise: Are Gays A Threat To Our Children?

Anti-gay activists often charge that gay men and women pose a threat to children. In this report, we explore the supposed connection between homosexuality and child sexual abuse, the conclusions reached by the most knowledgeable professionals in the field, and how anti-gay activists continue to ignore their findings. This has tremendous consequences, not just for gay men and women, but more importantly for the safety of all our children.

Straight From The Source: What the “Dutch Study” Really Says About Gay Couples

Anti-gay activists often cite the “Dutch Study” to claim that gay unions last only about 1½ years and that the these men have an average of eight additional partners per year outside of their steady relationship. In this report, we will take you step by step into the study to see whether the claims are true.

The FRC’s Briefs Are Showing

Tony Perkins’ Family Research Council submitted an Amicus Brief to the Maryland Court of Appeals as that court prepared to consider the issue of gay marriage. We examine just one small section of that brief to reveal the junk science and fraudulent claims of the Family “Research” Council.

Daniel Fetty Doesn’t Count

Daniel FettyThe FBI’s annual Hate Crime Statistics aren’t as complete as they ought to be, and their report for 2004 was no exception. In fact, their most recent report has quite a few glaring holes. Holes big enough for Daniel Fetty to fall through.