Box Turtle Bulletin

Rhode Island civil unions move along in the Senate

Gay advocates are disappointed by the bill, anti-gay advocates oppose anything like it. In fact, there may only be about 100 people in all of Rhode Island who really want the civil unions bill and all of them may be in the legislature.

I once said, decades ago in college student government, that a perfect compromise is one in which neither side wins. And while that language is perhaps less than poetic, it has truth. While I don’t believe that this is an area in which we should settle for less than full equality, nor do I see any reason for incremental steps in Rhode Island, in term of compromise this is not a bad one. For an unnecessary compromise.

But civil unions are what Rhode Island is getting, and all it’s getting for now, so perhaps we should decide to be happy about it.

Tomorrow the Senate Judiciary Committee will hold a hearing on the bill.

Marriage’s final frontier

In what has been, to me, a surprisingly short period of time, the fertile, tamed gay-supportive territory has come to support marriage equality. Democrats overwhelmingly are supportive, and independents have joined them to the extent that now a majority of Americans favor legalized same-sex marriages.

But Republicans – especially conservative evangelical Republicans – have held to their opposition with little exception. The red state, red meat, tea partying folk have not been receptive in any manner to talk about Teh Gheys being real people with real rights, especially the right to marry the person of their choosing.

Until recently. Very very recently.

Perhaps it took the high-profile support over unquestionably-conservative Ted Olson to make it possible for conservative Republican support to be considered. Perhaps the hopeless – but fascinating and visible – presidential campaign of Fred Karger introduced the possibility. Maybe it was Meghan McCain, Barbara Bush, or other young Republicans willing to talk back to their elders. But whatever allowed it, change has begun.

Marriage equality has finally set foot in this wild frontier, planted a flag, and claimed its place. In, of all places, Iowa’s activist Republican community. Today, Jeff Angelo, a former State Senator from Ames has launched a new group: Iowa Republicans for Freedom.

Angelo is a heterosexual father of three who identifies as an evangelical Christian. He regularly attends the Ames Evangelical Free Church. While he still considers himself “very much an activist Republican,” Angelo said he, and other Republicans, are recognizing banning same-sex marriage violates the widely-held conservative belief of personal freedoms.

But don’t assume that Angelo is just some “squishy moderate” who has let his liberal side take over. Angelo’s anti-gay credentials couldn’t be stronger. (DMRegister)

Angelo, who formerly lived in Creston, had opposed gay marriage while serving in the Iowa Senate and was co-sponsor of the Iowa Defense of Marriage Act in the late 1990s. In 2006, he was the lead sponsor of a proposed state constitutional amendment to define marriage as between a man and a woman. He said he gradually came to a realization after leaving the legislature that his stance on same-sex marriage was wrong and hurtful.

Like many, he had believed the lies he told himself. Especially the old “my gay friends” fiction. (Iowa Independent)

“I previously bought into the notion that I could tell my gay friends how much I loved them, that I just disapproved of their lifestyle and they would be OK with that,” Angelo admitted. “But they told me that I made them feel lesser in my eyes or that I made them feel like a second-class citizen. I labored under delusion for some time that [what my friends said] wasn’t true, that they really believed I loved them and that I was their friend.”

And he found that once he questioned his presumptions, it turned out that this new respect for his fellow man fit better with his ideals than had his prejudices. So he’s now sharing that message.

“Far too often, the conversation on marriage can get lost in rhetoric,” Angelo said. “But this debate really centers around one idea: whether government has the right to say whom a person should love and marry. As a proud conservative, I believe in smaller, limited government, and that government should have no more of a right to say whom I can marry than they should be able to tell my gay and lesbian brothers and sisters whom they can marry.”
…
“It is time for conservatives to get back to their roots,” Angelo said. “Through Iowa Republicans for Freedom, we will begin a conversation about whether our party and our state will stand for true conservative values, or whether we will allow ourselves to get lost in senseless debates that do nothing but demean our neighbors and threaten the rights of our fellow Iowans.”

Jeff Angelo is a very welcome advocate. His voice can reach those who simply cannot hear what our community is trying to say. I truly wish him well.

How anti-gays view the world (it ain’t smart and it ain’t pretty)

We generally ignore the rantings that the anti-gay activists write to each other to bolster their resolve to fight on in their lost cause. No one outside of their fellow-thinkers read them and the head-bobbing dolls will never see our challenges to their predetermined beliefs.

But today I think it’s worth exploring both how this crowd perceives the world and how very far from reality they really are. Our example is an article by Peter Heck in which he delivers his response to Don Lemon’s coming out.

Let me start by saying that it can be tempting to believe that folks like Heck are just making a buck off of the ignorance and malice of their audience. And while that might be some part of it, don’t doubt for a second that he really believes what he says. This is his crowd, his social circle, his political allies, this is where he lives his life.

Heck’s worldview is an uncomplicated one. Everyone is easily fitted within a compartment, and there are only two. There are good moral born-again Bible believers, and the evil vile rest of humanity. And everything fits nicely along with everyone. Good is good and done by good people, bad is bad and done by bad people, and there’s no need for any of that liberal, gray-area, situational ethics type of thinking.

Let’s begin.

CNN host Don Lemon recently became the latest in a string of high profile individuals to “come out of the closet” and inform everyone who would listen that he enjoys practicing homosexuality.

Doubtlessly, you too missed the interview in which Lemon talked about how he enjoys practicing homosexuality. Because, of course, it didn’t happen. Lemon didn’t talk about enjoying anything or practicing anything. He simply spoke about the reality that he is a person who is attracted to persons of the same sex and is neither ashamed of that nor seeking to change it. In a word, he’s gay.

But in the world of anti-gays, there is no such thing as a gay person; and in the world of extremist anti-gays, there is no such thing as a same-sex attractions. Anti-gays can only process homosexuality in terms of behavior so everything is presented as though that is what Lemon discussed.

First, why do the very people that constantly tell us that what a person does in their bedroom is no one else’s business, simultaneously find it necessary to inform everyone of what they do in their bedroom? If this is a private matter, Don, then let’s keep it private. Perhaps I’m the only one who feels this way, but frankly, I don’t care to know what kind of sex the evening news anchor is into.

It’s hard to find a response to this, it’s so wrong on so many levels. Unlike Heck, I didn’t hear Lemon’s announcement and suddenly know what kind of sex he is into. I don’t know what goes on in his bedroom, if anything.

But in Heck’s world, just as there are only two “kinds” of people, there are only two “kinds” of sex: that which meets the requirements of his sexual code, and that which does not. And any mention of one’s orientation is an announcement that you have abandoned sanctioned sex and are delighting in practicing debauchery.

But the real purpose of Heck’s rant – and what seems to be a growing trend in anti-gay rants – is to whine and moan about how mistreated are those who seek the legal and societal harm of gay people. Why if “a Bible-believing, born-again follower of Jesus Christ whose faith teaches him that homosexuality is morally improper” simply call a gay person an oddball decadent sexual anarchist, then they are labeled a “hater”!! How intolerant!!

And Heck sees plenty to blame. It’s the fault of gay “proponents of sexual anarchy”, the “uber-leftist Joy Behar” (a Christophobe), Charles Barkley (“whose most famous contribution to his profession was spitting on opposing fans in the crowd”), and “vile and perverted” Lady Gaga. They are the one’s who are calling him names.

And the funny thing is that Peter Heck really doesn’t think that he’s a “hater”.

Yes, everything he writes would give that impression. Words of contempt flow from his keyboard. He dismisses those with whom he disagrees in the meanest possible way. And yet he doesn’t see himself in terms of “hate”. Real love, you see, is that which reminds the sinner of his depravity and warns of eternal punishment. So really anything, anything whatsoever at all, is “loving” provided that it is done by those he considers good.

I believe that a good many people who oppose our equality can be reached, including many in Heck’s target demographic. Yes, they have preconceptions, but they are not completely closed off to facts. They have prejudices, but can over time be persuaded to rethink their views.

But people like Peter Heck are beyond our reach. Their “reality” is impervious to facts, to logic, to reason. They know what they know and nothing is going to dissuade them. Good people already agree with them and the views of those on the evil vile side of humanity are, by definition, wrong.

Congratulations, Illinoisans

Today same-sex couples in Illinois can be joined in civil union and gain many of the state-granted advantages, obligations, and rights of marriage.

Our congratulations to all Illinoisans. To same-sex couples for expanded rights. To gay people for a step up in recognition of your worth as a fellow citizen. And to all other residents for your inclusion in the still-small number of states that have expressed their willingness to place humanity ahead of tradition, animus, or exclusion.

San Francisco Giants: “It Gets Better”

There’s hardly a gay male alive who wasn’t tormented by jocks while in school, which is why this video by the San Francisco Giants so incredibly moving. The video features four current players — pitchers Matt Cain and Sergio Romo, outfielder Andres Torres and Cy Young Award winning pitcher Barry Zito — and Giants hitting coach Hensley “Bam Bam” Muelens.

Obama Issues Pride Month Proclamation

President Barack Obama issued a proclamation last night declaring the month of June the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Pride Month:

The story of America’s Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender (LGBT) community is the story of our fathers and sons, our mothers and daughters, and our friends and neighbors who continue the task of making our country a more perfect Union. It is a story about the struggle to realize the great American promise that all people can live with dignity and fairness under the law. Each June, we commemorate the courageous individuals who have fought to achieve this promise for LGBT Americans, and we rededicate ourselves to the pursuit of equal rights for all, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.

…Every generation of Americans has brought our Nation closer to fulfilling its promise of equality. While progress has taken time, our achievements in advancing the rights of LGBT Americans remind us that history is on our side, and that the American people will never stop striving toward liberty and justice for all.

President Obama’s declaration also notes that this June marks the 30th anniversary of the known AIDS epidemic (we now know that AIDS had already been killing people for many decades before it was reported by the CDC in 1981), and urges a recommitment to AIDS awareness. “This landmark anniversary is an opportunity for the LGBT community and allies to recommit to raising awareness about HIV/AIDS and continuing the fight against this deadly pandemic.”

William Tapley Sees Penises at the Denver International Airport

He calls himself The Third Eagle of the Apocalypse and “the co-prophet of the End Times.” I wonder if the sight of church steeples thrusting over the skyline gives him the vapors?

The Daily Agenda for Wednesday, June 1

TODAY’S AGENDA:
Open For Question: 30 Years of AIDS: Washington, D.C. and online. In observance of the upcoming 30th anniversary of the Centers for Disease Control’s first report on a strange illness that we now know of as AIDS, the White House will facilitate a live online discussion on the AIDS epidemic. Surgeon General Dr. Regina Benjamin, Director of the White House Office of National AIDS Policy Jeffrey Crowley and Director of the Division of AIDS at the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, NIH, Dr. Carl Dieffenbach will host the forum beginning at 3:00 p.m. EDT. You can submit your questions in advance and tune in to WhiteHouse.gov/live to watch the discussion.

Organized Labor Announces Support for Marriage Equality: Albany, NY. Representatives from several labor unions and associations will join Empire State Pride Agenda Executive Director Ross D. Levi as they call on the New York Legislature to pass marriage equality this session. A press conference will take place this afternoon at 1:00 p.m. in the LCA Press Room (Room 13) of the Legislative Office Building in Albany. Many unions in New York have already declared support for marriage equality, including the AFL-CIO, RWDSU, United Federation of Teachers, CWA, 32BJ, Teamsters Local 237 and Affiliates of the New York City Central Labor Council.

Registration Deadline for Suicide Prevention Symposium: Waltham, MA. The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention will hold a symposium on LGBT Suicide Prevention on Saturday, June 18 at Bentley University in Waltham, Massachusetts. The keynote speaker will be Dr. Caitlin Ryan of the Family Acceptance Project, and the symposium will feature several breakout sessions on social media, mental health, and suicide prevention strategies for transgender and gay people across the lifespan. Registration for the day-long event ends today.

EQCA Town Hall: Redlands, CA. Equality California will host a “Back to the Ballot?” Town hall meeting in Redlands to discuss whether we should wait for the courts to restore the freedom to marry — a decision which could have a nationwide impact — or whether Californians should try to overturn Prop. 8 through a ballot measure in 2012. The town hall will take place this evening at the University of Redlands in the Casa Loma Room from 6:00 to 8:00 p.m.

Gay Days: Orlando, FL. This week is the annual celebration n Orlando. It began in 1991 as a day for Orlando visitors to “Wear Red and Be Seen.” An estimated 3,000 attendees participated that year, but has grown to more than 150,000 celebrants from all over the world. When city officials decided to officially welcome Gay Days in 1998, televangelist Pat Robertson famously predicted the eminent destruction of the entire nation. “It’ll bring about terrorist bombs; it’ll bring earthquakes, tornadoes, and possibly a meteor,” he warned. We’ve somehow managed to soldier on, and Gay Days this year comes roaring back to mark its 20th anniversary.

Pride Celebrations This Weekend: Athens, Greece; Albuquerque (Los Ranchos), NM; Boiling Springs (Spartanburg) SC; Bucharest, Romania; Buffalo, NY; Cambridge/Kitchner/Waterloo, ON; Columbia, MO; Cork, Ireland; Davenport (Quad Cities) IA; Dayton, OH; Detroit, MI; Ft. Collins, CO; Guerneville, CA; Hampton Roads, VA; Honolulu, HI; Huntington/Charleston, WV; Kalamazoo, MI; Kansas City, MO; Queens, NY; Sacramento, CA; Salt Lake City, UT; Spencer, IN; Staten Island, NY and Winnipeg, MB.

AIDS Walk This Weekend: Boston, MA; London, UK; Long Beach, CA, and Syracuse, NY.

If you know of something that belongs on the agenda, please send it here. PLEASE, don’t forget to include the basics: who, what, when, where, and URL (if available).

Teen pop-stars matter

I don’t pay much attention to Miley Cyrus. I’m not a 15 year old girl, I am suspicious when children of celebrities get cast in television shows, and I’ve seen way too many child stars implode. But, so far at least, Cyrus (now 18) seems to be transitioning well from her Hannah Montana role to a solo artist, has not got down Lindsay Lohan Lane, and may well be able to face adulthood with a sense of perspective.

And, okay I’ll admit it, Party in the USA is infectious.

Yet still, Cyrus is not on the short-list of people I’d select to fight for my equality. For one thing, her audience can’t vote.

But Cyrus can do one thing that even the most seasoned politico cannot achieve. She can influence where the parents of little girls spend their money. And she’s not hesitant to do so.

Last week, Urban Outfitters had a little public image problem over some jewelry that they sold which was similar to that of a small independent jeweler. Miley Cyrus used it to raise a different issue (Vancouver Sun)

Cyrus Tweeted, “Love that everybody is hating on Urban Outfitters.” She added, “Not only do they steal from artists but every time you give them money you help finance a campaign against gay equality. #SHADYASHELL”

Hashtags aside, Cyrus also pointed out, “IF WE ALLOW GAY MARRIAGE NEXT THING U KNOW PEOPLE WILL BE MARRYING GOLD FISH” – Rick Santorum UO contributed $13,000 to this mans campaign”

You and I may not care what Miley Cyrus thinks. The voters in your state may not care what Miley Cyrus thinks. But retailers of clothing very much care what Miley Cyrus thinks, especially when she’s tweeting to a million kids that could be their customers.

And Cyrus’ tweet is indicative of something larger that we are just beginning to see.

For decades we have relied on the decency of corporate executives, the economic advantage of a diversity, the loyalty of gay shoppers, and (in rare cases with limited success) on boycotts of the most egregious offenders.

But now, corporations are discovering the cost of being associated in any way with anti-gay causes or politicians. Target discovered this past year that contributing to a politician whose economic policies they prefer can lose you customers if he also has anti-gay social policies. And earlier this year the CEO of Urban Outfitters admitted how his boss’ association with Santorum is problematic. (Philly.com)

“You all probably know, till the day he dies Dick Hayne’s going to be famous for giving Rick Santorum some money 15 years ago,” said Senk, who has often described Hayne as a mentor and was referring to his well-known political leanings. “Dick Hayne’s a Republican, OK?”

“I’m the first openly gay CEO of a Fortune 1000 company, and I supported Bob Casey, who dethroned Santorum,” Senk continued. “So, obviously, Dick and I don’t agree, politically. Now, Dick has moderated over the years, and I probably have moderated over the years, because we have learned from each other…”

And as time goes on, as the kids who are Cyrus’s audience become a larger part of the market, more and more companies are going to find themselves trying to explain why they supported politicians who treated gay people as inferior. No longer will support for or against equality be a matter of little concern for kids who have grown up seeing gay folk as maybe a little different but no lesser than themselves.

And as we approach the 2012 election cycle, you can be certain that many a corporate executive will consider the ramifications of writing a check. And more than a few will decide that they don’t want Miley Cyrus, or anyone else, linking their name with someone best known for their anti-gay statements and positions.

Is it too much to hope that Miley Cyrus just doomed Rick Santorum’s presidential campaign?

LA Times “corrective rape” article

South Africa is a nation with a foot in both the future and the past. With marriage equality and protections for gay people in the constitution, it is a lesson to its neighbors. But outside of the major cities, gay people suffer the same threats and indignities as most elsewhere on the continent.

Robyn Dixon, writing for the LA Times, draws attention to the “corrective rape” of lesbians that is often found in the township.

In South African townships there’s a crime dubbed “corrective rape,” rape to “cure” lesbians, and sometimes gay men and transsexuals. They are told they are being taught a lesson: how to be a real woman or man, survivors say.

“They say, ‘We’ll sort you out. At the end of the day, you are a woman. You have to find a man.’ They feel that being gay is not African and we are bringing another culture to the community,” says Ntsupe Mohapi, 38, a gay activist in Kwa-Thema who has been threatened and taunted, but not attacked.

(Note: Dixon – like most press coverage – errs in a mention about the Uganda Anti-Homosexuality Bill.)

The Difference Between Sarah Palin And Me

When I went on a week-long tour last week that was not a publicity seeking tour, I rented this at the Columbus airport:

But when Sarah Palin embarked on a tour that was “not a publicity seeking tour,” she rented this:

Just sayin’.

NBA’s Steve Nash: Players Would Accept Gay Teammate

New York Times’ Howard Beck asked Phoenix Suns’ point guard  Steve Nash whether the NBA was ready for an openly gay player:

If a player in the locker room came out, it would come and go quickly, too. I really don’t think it’s a big issue anymore. I think it would be surprisingly accepted, and a shorter shelf life than maybe we would imagine. I think the time has come when it should happen soon. I think it will be something that won’t take on this life of its own. It won’t be the O. J. trial.

Nash described the Suns’ CEO Rick Welts’s coming-out annoucement two weeks ago as no big deal since players have little contact with the executive office. But even if a General Manager had come out as gay, “There would be a lot of, ‘Really?’ And then a short period later, everyone’s like, ‘Who cares?’ and moves on.”

US Adults Think 25% of Americans Are Gay

I really don’t know what to make of this:

U.S. adults, on average, estimate that 25% of Americans are gay or lesbian. More specifically, over half of Americans (52%) estimate that at least one in five Americans are gay or lesbian, including 35% who estimate that more than one in four are. Thirty percent put the figure at less than 15%.

How one views the percentage of gay Americans appears to have mixed results when it comes to equality. Those who support marriage equality peg the percentage of gay people at 25.1% versus 24.1% for those who don’t. But those who believe gay and lesbian relationships should be criminalized peg the percentage at 26.2% versus 23.8 for those who don’t. With a 4% margin of error, both results are a statistical tie, but the results on criminalization might be worth further investigation.

Ben Cohen on CNN About Anti-Bullying Advocacy

I’m Back

By the way, I checked: Falwell is still dead.

Other than the Daily Agendas (which I wrote last week), you haven’t heard from me lately for one simple reason: my partner and I had a lovely week off. Last Saturday, my widowed mother, age 71 going on 16, married a very nice widower. (For future reference: grief counseling. Even if all you’re grieving is Oprah.) And since we had a week to kill between mom’s wedding and my niece’s second birthday, my partner and I decided to take a road trip through the incredibly beautiful West Virginia mountains to see Thomas Jefferson’s homestead at Monticello, as well as his lesser-known home at Poplar Forest, just south of Lynchburg.

Yeah, that Lynchburg. Which was interesting, because the historic city on the banks of the James River is incredibly charming, but the world-famous campus on the city’s outskirts has all of the charms of an industrial park sandwiched between two freeways, a highway, a shopping mall and a cineplex. Which is exactly where it is.

We didn’t stay long. Next stop: Danville, where Mary’s Cafeteria will happily load you up with the best fried chicken, corn pudding, peach cobbler, mud pie. From there, it was an overnight at Hillsville, then a leisurely drive back to Columbus, Ohio by way of Beckley, Charleston, Parkersburg, Athens, Hocking Hills, then Columbus for the big birthday party.

And now Tucson. It’s good to be home and time to get back to work. Congratulations Mom and Gus, and happy birthday Lily!