Box Turtle Bulletin

The Daily Agenda for Friday, June 21

TODAY’S AGENDA:
Restored Hope Network Annual Conference: Oklahoma City, OK. The Restored Hope Network, the nascent, more hard-core ex-gay rival to the Artist-Formerly-Known-As-Exodus, is kicking off its second annual conference in Oklahoma City today. With Exodus’s announcement Wednesday that it was disbanding after 37 years, RHN is certainly feeling its oats. In a press release issued yesterday, RHN crowed (PDF: 1 page):

We, the Board of Restored Hope Network, grieve the decision of Alan Chambers and the board of Exodus to close down this venerable organization. It feels like the unnecessary death of a dear friend. It would have been better for them to have stepped aside and allowed others to carry on the message of hope for transformed lives. Although the timing of the news was a surprise to many, the shutting down of Exodus is the not-unexpected outcome of a cheap grace theology that severs the confession of Christ as Savior from the confession of Christ as Lord.

While some falsely proclaim that a transformed life is optional for Christians, the united witness of Jesus and the writers of Scripture are clear: In God’s grace true saving faith results in a life of holiness and sexual purity. Thankfully God does not leave his people without a witness to the transforming power of Jesus Christ. The Restored Hope Network was formed in 2012 to provide just such a witness. We welcome all those cast adrift by recent events to know that God is still faithful.

“I am so thankful that Restored Hope Network exists at this time to continue the message of transformation and new life in Christ.”
–Frank Worthen, one of the founders of Exodus (1976) and of the Restored Hope Network (2012)

RHN’s conference will be held at Oklahoma City’s Cherokee Hills Baptist Church beginning at 9:00 a.m. and continues through Saturday.

Pride Celebrations This Weekend: Augusta, GA; Berlin, Germany; Biarritz, France; Chicago, IL; Columbia, SC (Black Pride); Columbus, OH; Durango, CO; Essex, UK; Fribourg, Switzerland; Gloucester, UK; Houston, TX; Knoxville, TN; Napa, CA; New Orleans, LA; Olympia, WA; Palermo, Italy; Regina, SK; Salisbury, NC; Santa Fe, NM; Skopje, Macedonia; Sofia, Bulgaria; Wausau, WI; Wilton Manors, FL.

AIDS Walks This Weekend: Oakland, CA.

Other Events This Weekend: Frameline Film Festival, San Francisco, CA.

TODAY’S BIRTHDAY:
Meredith Baxter: 1947. Her first big break on television was in 1972, when she stared as Bridget in the short-lived CBS sitcom Bridget Loves Bernie. After the series was cancelled, she married her co-star, David Birney, which made her Meridith Baxter-Birney. A few years later, she landed a part in the painfully earnest drama Family (the show is credited for inventing what has become the bane of too-self-important television, the “very special episodes”) before lightening up again as Alex P. Keaton’s mom on Family Ties. In between and afterwards, she starred in a number of made-for-TV movies and various television episodes.

Baxter divorced Birney in 1989, and she went back to using Meredith Baxter professionally. She married again in 1995, but divorced five years later. The National Enquirer reported in 2009 that Baxter was spotted on a lesbian cruise with a female friend. The ensuing speculation finally led to her coming out as a lesbian during an interview with Matt Lauer on Today. “I got involved with someone I never expected to get involved with, and it was that kind of awakening,” she said. “I never fought it because it was like, oh, I understand why I had the issues I had early in life. I had a great deal of difficulty connecting with men in relationships.” Her memoir, Untied: A Memoir of Family, Fame, and Floundering, came out un 2011 in hardcover and Kindle editions, and was released again last year as a paperback.

If you know of something that belongs on the agenda, please send it here. Don’t forget to include the basics: who, what, when, where, and URL (if available).

And feel free to consider this your open thread for the day. What’s happening in your world?

Reactions to Exodus’s Closing Continues To Pour In

@eshep Now Exodus International + Alan Chambers need to apologize to all the Bible-believing #Christians they bamboozled. #tcot @jmattbarber

— Peter LaBarbera (@PeterLaBarbera) June 20, 2013

Good news: @ExodusIntl has closed its apostate doors helping biblically sound @RestoredHopeNet to minister to those w/ unwanted SSA #Hope

— Matt Barber (@jmattbarber) June 20, 2013

Also, this:

Exodus International, criticized for ‘reparative therapies’ for gay Christians, to shut down http://t.co/Bu3l31dUzg

— mia farrow (@MiaFarrow) June 20, 2013

NOMian reality

Sometimes I think the National Organization for Marriage gets so caught up in their own spin that they have no notion of how surreal their proclamations sound. Consider this bit about Alaska Senator Lisa Murkowski’s recent support for equality:

Brian Brown, president of the National Organization for Marriage, responded: “Senator Murkowski has sealed her political fate. Alaskans voted by an overwhelming majority (68%-32%) to protect marriage in their Constitution when given the opportunity, and an even stronger majority of Republicans in Alaska supported that move; thus, her betrayal of marriage is tantamount to political suicide.”

For those who have forgotten, in 2010 Sarah Palin and the Tea Partiers ran a candidate against Murkowski in the Republican primary. She just wasn’t conservative enough for them. And when Joe Miller won the primary, they thought that Murkowski’s moderate positions had sealed her political fate.

But Murkowski ran a write-in campaign.

I don’t mean a third party ticket. I don’t mean being listed without a party. I mean that people had to pull out a pen and physically write her name down on their ballot. There hadn’t been a US Senate seat win by write-in ballot since Strom Thurmond in 1956.

Murkowski won. Miller challenged a bunch of the ballots due to misspellings of Murkowski’s name, but she still beat him. He sued and went to court claiming that there must have been fraud (cuz, really, how could that many people go write in her name?) and the courts still said that she won. The people had a choice between ticking the box for a NOM-approved candidate or remembering and writing in a difficult-to-spell name. They chose Murkowski.

So in just what surreal reality – let’s call it a NOMian reality – does Brown think that the Alaskan voters are going to replace Lisa Murkowski with a more conservative candidate?

Please Call Congressman Louie Gohmert

The Honorable Representative Louie Gohmert is prone to confusion. Again and again, he says things that just aren’t true. And he just demonstrated his lack of mental clarity in this conversation with ThinkProgress:

THINKPROGRESS: Where do you stand on the Employment Non-Discrimination Act?

GOHMERT: I’m not aware of exactly which one you’re talking about

THINKPROGRESS: It would protect LGBT workers from being fired due to their sexual orientation.

GOHMERT: Who wants to go talking about sexual orientation when they’re working? Good grief.

Apparently the Honorable Representative Gohmert has forgotten this bit on his official government web page:

Today, he and his wife Kathy are the proud parents of three daughters.

Surely the Honorable Representative is no hypocrite. This must be another instance of his confusion taking hold. I suggest we call his offices and ask him to remove this bit of information that (“Good grief”) he himself would find offensive if he knew it was there.

I’ve already called both his offices. To paraphrase the conversation:

Me: I’d like to ask that the Congressman remove all references to his wife from his official website.

Them: His wife?

Me: Yes. He says that sexual orientation shouldn’t be discussed in the workplace, so he should start by removing all references to his own orientation from official communication.

Them: Okaaaay. I’ll pass that on.

His staff were quite pleasant to me, and I suggest offering them the same courtesy in return. Here are his numbers:

Washington D.C. office: (202) 225-3035

Tyler, Texas office: (903) 561-6349

We owe the Honorable Representative every assistance, given the intellectual demands of his duties and apparent ability to carry them out.

AMA oppose blood donation ban

Many other industrial leading nations now have lifted their lifetime ban on blood donations by gay men. Now the American Medical Association has called on the US Food and Drug Administration to do the same. (ABC)

The American Medical Association voted Tuesday to oppose a decades long ban by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, which prohibits gay men from donating blood.
…
“The lifetime ban on blood donation for men who have sex with men is discriminatory and not based on sound science,” AMA board member Dr. William Kobler said in a statement. “This new policy urges a federal policy change to ensure blood donation bans or deferrals are applied to donors according to their individual level of risk and are not based on sexual orientation alone.”

The opposition goes silent

Polls indicate that a majority of Americans now support marriage equality. This is a wonderful achievement that bodes well for our future rights.

However, I think that a shift has occurred that is not well measured by polls. I believe that the nation has changed its views on who bears the burden of proof. This is, in many ways, a more important shift than merely those who favor or oppose same-sex marriage; it’s a shift in how the debate is conducted.

Until recently, there has been an understanding that many Americans opposed same-sex marriage, and that their objections would be voiced with conviction. Whether one agreed or disagreed, it was not considered to be outside of reasonable debate that a politician would hold their head high and declare that they “support traditional marriage” with more than a hint of “and you should too”.

And those who championed equality didn’t get off so lightly. We were expected to defend our position, to explain just why it is that our demands were justified or our ‘change in the rules’ is needed. We had the burden of proof. We started from a defensive position.

But now it is those who oppose equality that must explain themselves. Where once “I support the traditional definition of marriage” was sufficient, now even those who also fear including same-sex couples are not content with such a limited explanation. Now the trite phrase is issued – if at all – with more of an air of defensiveness than with a presumption that surely all reasonable people agree.

Other issues which divide the nation are strongly debated. And the public doesn’t think any less about those who strongly support or oppose positions on immigration, gun legislation, tax policy, or even Obamacare. You may disagree, but while your opponent is “wrong”, they are not “vile”.

But it seems to me that we have entered a phase in which one can be “not ready” or “not convinced” or “not yet evolved” on the issue of marriage equality. That’s simply opinion. But to be actively opposed suggests a character flaw, something with a whiff of nastiness and maybe even vile. The public – right and left – seem to have decided that you can support gay marriage or you can not support gay marriage, but you can’t oppose gay marriage any longer.

So more and more, those who can safely be assumed to favor heterosexual superiority simply choose to say nothing. Instead of defending their God-given moral view, they announce their support for states’ rights, defer to the wisdom of the courts, or just change the subject.

Politician after politician, those most skilled at detecting the currents of the populace, have suddenly found that they just aren’t all that worked up about the issue. Even George W. Bush, the man most tied to the campaign against equality, decided that he just doesn’t have an opinion anymore.

And today we have another good example.

The Palm Beach Post has an article about activists in Florida beginning a campaign to change minds in that state towards an eventual referendum to reverse their constitutional ban on marriage equality. It’s a nice article, but the most interesting paragraph is this:

Republican Gov. Rick Scott is staying out of the argument, however. Scott spokeswoman Jackie Schutz noted that voters put the ban in the constitution before he was governor and that he is focused on other issues.

Translated out of politician speak, Scott said, “My view on marriage is… ummm… look a squirrel.”

No DOMA or Prop 8 rulings today

The Supreme Court did not deliver rulings on the constitutionality of the federal Defense of Marriage Act or California’s Proposition 8 today. The next date for the announcement of rulings is Monday, June 24.

Monday is the last scheduled day of this year’s calendar, though the Supreme Court could schedule another day of their choosing. And while such an additional day would be expected to be within the week, as SCOTUS has neither a boss nor any constitutional restrictions, they could drag this out as long as they wish.

The Daily Agenda for Thursday, June 20

TODAY’S AGENDA:
“Our America with Lisa Ling” To Air Confrontation Between Ex-Gay Survivors and Alan Chambers: OWN Network, 10:00 p.m. EDT. From Lisa Ling’s web site:

The story of Exodus International, the LGBT men and women who have been affected by the organization and the nationwide dialogue that surrounds this topic continues in an Our America special report.

For almost 40 years, Exodus International claimed to offer a “cure” for homosexuality. Alan Chambers, the leader of Exodus, decided last year to stop endorsing the controversial practice of gay-reparative therapy. And now, he has a new message: an apology.

In a special episode, Lisa Ling is joined by a group of survivors of the condemned and damaging practice of “reparative therapy” as they confront Alan Chambers. Chambers recently asked Ling to help orchestrate an opportunity in which he could formally apologize to those who felt deceived and defrauded by Exodus’ practices and to announce that the organization will cease to be an “ex gay” organization.

Not only did Chambers announce that Exodus would cease to be an ex-gay organization, but it would cease to be an organization altogether. I’ve heard that the taped confrontation lasted about three and a half brutal hours, which was edited down to fit the hour-long program. If there’s ever television worth watching, this is it.

Pride Celebrations This Weekend: Augusta, GA; Berlin, Germany; Biarritz, France; Chicago, IL; Columbia, SC (Black Pride); Columbus, OH; Durango, CO; Essex, UK; Fribourg, Switzerland; Gloucester, UK; Houston, TX; Knoxville, TN; Napa, CA; New Orleans, LA; Olympia, WA; Palermo, Italy; Regina, SK; Salisbury, NC; Santa Fe, NM; Skopje, Macedonia; Sofia, Bulgaria; Wausau, WI; Wilton Manors, FL.

AIDS Walks This Weekend: Oakland, CA.

Other Events This Weekend: Frameline Film Festival, San Francisco, CA.

TODAY’S BIRTHDAY:
E Lynn Harris: 1955. He was born in Flint, Michigan, but was raised in Little Rock, Arkansas. When he attended the University of Arkansas, he became the first African-American editor of the university’s yearbook. After graduation, he worked in sales for IBM and Hewlett Packard, but quit after thirteen hears to pursue his first love, writing. His first novel, Invisible Life, followed an African-American man’s journey of self-discovery as gay man, and themes of the struggle between acceptance and shame among African-American men on the “down low” would become a recurring theme in Harris’s oeuvre. Invisible Life first failed to find a publisher, so Harris he published it himself in 1991 and sold it out of the trunk of his car before he was finally discovered by Anchor Books in 1994.

After Invisible Life’s publication as a paperback, his career was set. He went on to author ten consecutive books which landed on The New York Times’s Best Seller List, making him simultaneously among the most successful African-American authors and gay authors for the past two decades. LGBT advocate Kieth Boykin observed that Harris’s books encouraged the black community to talk openly about homosexuality. “It was hard to go on a subway in places in New York or D.C. and not see some black woman reading an E. Lynn Harris novel,” Boykin said. Harris died in 2009 in Los Angeles of heart disease. In 2010, the Los Angeles Times posthumously named Invisible Life as one of the top 20 “classic works of gay literature.”

If you know of something that belongs on the agenda, please send it here. Don’t forget to include the basics: who, what, when, where, and URL (if available).

And feel free to consider this your open thread for the day. What’s happening in your world?

BREAKING: Exodus International is Shutting Down

Announced moments ago:

Exodus International, the oldest and largest Christian ministry dealing with faith and homosexuality announced tonight that it’s closing its doors after three-plus decades of ministry. The Board of Directors reached a decision after a year of dialogue and prayer about the organization’s place in a changing culture.

“We’re not negating the ways God used Exodus to positively affect thousands of people, but a new generation of Christians is looking for change – and they want to be heard,” Tony Moore, Board member of Exodus. The message came less than a day after Exodus released a statement apologizing (www.exodusinternational.org/apology) to the gay community for years of undue judgment by the organization and the Christian Church as a whole.

“Exodus is an institution in the conservative Christian world, but we’ve ceased to be a living, breathing organism,” said Alan Chambers, President of Exodus. “For quite some time we’ve been imprisoned in a worldview that’s neither honoring toward our fellow human beings, nor biblical.”

Chambers continued: “From a Judeo-Christian perspective, gay, straight or otherwise, we’re all prodigal sons and daughters. Exodus International is the prodigal’s older brother, trying to impose its will on God’s promises, and make judgments on who’s worthy of His Kingdom. God is calling us to be the Father – to welcome everyone, to love unhindered.”

For these reasons, the Board of Directors unanimously voted to close Exodus International and begin a separate ministry. “This is a new season of ministry, to a new generation,” said Chambers. “Our goals are to reduce fear (reducefear.org), and come alongside churches to become safe, welcoming, and mutually transforming communities.”

Liveblog of Exodus Conference

7:00: I’ve never live-blogged before, mostly because I really am not good at thinking on my feet. I’m the kind of person who needs to ruminate a bit. And ordinarily I wouldn’t consider it appropriate to do it at this setting, but since this is going out live via webcast for free, I’ll do it this one time. This will be the only time I live-blog this conference. Click here for my pre-conference impressions.

You can watch the live webcast here. It looks like you have to register, but the free code for tonight only is “TrueStory.”

Anthony!

By the way, my good friend Anthony Venn-Brown, of Australia’s ex-gay survival organization Freedom2B, is here, sitting in the pew next to me. It’s so good to see him again. You can read about him here.

All times Pacific.

7:09: Alan Chambers is doing a few introductory remarks — general announcements, introductions, things like that. He’s loose and funny, as usual. Hints at a “very important message tonight.”

7:15: A Contemporary Christian Music band is playing. Never mind the content, just as a matter of style CCM is just not my thing. But they seem like they’re having fun.

7:21: This is definitely a smaller crowd. In years past, the opening night had more of a major concert hall kind of a feel. Tonight, we’re in a chapel that’s about half the size of previous venues. It’s definitely more “churchy” and much less of a large scale production as before. I hear that attendance is now a little over 300, compared to I think somewhere like 700 or 800 last year.

7:25: “Shout it out and life up one voice, in worship.” They’re still singing.

7:35: They do like to sing. I think this will probably continue until about 8:00, if past experience is any guide. I will say, the drummer is pretty good.

7:46. “You’re going to hear some true stories this week, and they’re going to be good.” Chambers is welcoming the live-streamers and introducing Aaron Harris for his testimony. This is a standards feature of plenary sessions, and a common feature of Evangelical worship in general. He’s definitely gay, or, as the program says, “he uses his personal story and struggle with SSA (same-sex attractions) to address hard subjects like addiction and abuse in order to bring light into dark areas often ignored.” Was abused by someone “inside the church.”

The last thing I want to do is diminish what he’s telling the crowd. These are real people, after all, talking about some very tough, personal, intimate, frank, and humiliating things. It’s easy for those outside the evangelical culture to mock the institution of “testimony,” but it is more than just a powerful form of story-telling. It’s cathartic for many of those listening, as well as for some of the speakers.

8:00 “I still struggle. In the past three months have been the most intense struggle of my life.” But God is “using my story to help others.” This is not a typical testimony of ultimate triumph, but one that strikes me as humble and honest.

8:02: Also, “Is my goal to lead people to Christ, or is my goal to change them? If it’s to change them, then I need to step away.”

8:03: Alan Chambers is back at the podium, leading a prayer. From here on out, a paraphrase of his comments:

“We’re grateful that you take us as we are, that you love us as we are.” Prays that “we turn off the tapes that tell us things that are not true.”

8:06: Why are we here this week? Most of us here … are here as Christians with same-sex attractions, who believe that sexual expression is reserved for one man and one woman in marriage. … this will be a safe haven for us. We live in a messy reality. Everyone lives in a messy reality, but God would rather he had messy children than no children at all.

8:09: Our stories have not changed. But there are things that happening in current headlines that we need to address.

8:10: Exodus International’s website has announced that Exodus is shutting down.

Exodus is an institution in the conservative Christian world, but we’ve ceased to be a living, breathing organism,” said Alan Chambers, President of Exodus. “For quite some time we’ve been imprisoned in a worldview that’s neither honoring toward our fellow human beings, nor biblical.”

Chambers continued: “From a Judeo-Christian perspective, gay, straight or otherwise, we’re all prodigal sons and daughters. Exodus International is the prodigal’s older brother, trying to impose its will on God’s promises, and make judgments on who’s worthy of His Kingdom. God is calling us to be the Father – to welcome everyone, to love unhindered.”

For these reasons, the Board of Directors unanimously voted to close Exodus International and begin a separate ministry. “This is a new season of ministry, to a new generation,” said Chambers. “Our goals are to reduce fear (reducefear.org), and come alongside churches to become safe, welcoming, and mutually transforming communities.”

8:14: Chambers: For the past 18 months, I’ve been embroiled in scandal, but only because I am sharing things that I’ve never shared before. Never did I believe that the things that I’ve shared would have ripped our ministry apart the way it has. Therefore I am convinced that the “scandal” is of God’s making.

8:16: Eighteen months ago, I spoke at the Gay Christian Network conference, and that was the beginning of the scandals. What I said was that 99% of the people that I met continue to struggle with same-sex attractions. Those things don’t go away. People say I am a heretic for saying that, but it is the power of God that permits me to stand in that reality.

(The audience doesn’t know the announcement yet.)

8:18: No matter how we behave, we have a irrevocable relationship with Jesus Christ. They say I’ve given people a license to sin, as if I have that power.

8:20: Speaks of “fear that keeps us acting a certain way, living a certain way, living like a child of an angry God. I was living my life pretending I’m something I’m not because I was living in fear of the church. It has been the most amazing journey to come to the realization that my Father in heaven will never abandon me. There is nothing I did to earn his love. My relationship is secure. I long for the day for people to live their lives to live in a way that pleases God, not because they have to but because they can. And so they will live in all kinds of ways, in ways that you may not agree with. He alone will judge. He didn’t call us to be prosecutors, but witnesses.

8:23: Exodus was formed in 1976 as a safe haven for gay people in a church where it wasn’t safe. I believe it was the work of God. It saved my life when I joined in 1991. I needed a place to take my mask off. But over time, like the church, Exodus has become entrenched in rules. Rather than being the father standing at the gate waiting for the son to come home. While there has been so much good at Exodus,there has also been bad. There have been people that we’ve hurt. There are horror stories. In 37 years we haven’t done anything right. We’ve helped people, but we’ve hurt people. One of the scandalous things that we’ve done is acknowledge that.

8:27: He’s talk about the show tomorrow night on Lisa Ling, where Chambers was confronted by ex-gay survivors and offer an apology. “It was excruciating. They told their true stories in a way that I will never forget. They told stories of abuse, pain, missed opportunities, from the church and even from Exodus.

8:30: I can’t just take responsibility for the good things. I have to take responsibility for the bad as well. (Speaking of the apology) And I’ve already heard from people that won’t be my friend anymore because of the things that I said.

8:31: When I was hired, I was asked What will like like success for Exodus. I said success for me will look like Exodus going out of business because the church is doing it’s job. In January 2012, after spending a lot of time with other leaders, we got together for a leadership conference and came with an agenda. We’re at a crossroads. We have only 4 options:

1. Stay the same. For us that wasn’t an option.

2.  Rebrand, which is common. Let’s put lipstick on the pig. Wasn’t an option. When they changed Kentucky Fried Chicken to KFC, they still sold fried chicken.

3. Modify, the goal we tried. But to completely modify, it’s risky and potentially deadly. Exodus has suffered, been ridiculed, maligned, scorned. Life has been incredibly difficult. I begged God to let me be a decorator. He said no.

4. What we realized was that God does not want us to modify Exodus further. We are at option 4, to shut down. I knew this option would come to pass. It’s the fulfillment of what I was hired to do.

(The crowd is very still.)

8:36. This will leave a void, one that I hope will be filled by nothing but the church. I long for the day when the best place a kid can call is the church. Exodus was created in a void. There has been good that’s come out, but God is calling us home to the church, the imperfect, messy, sometimes mean church.

8:38: We’re going to leave a void. What do we do with all of you? We’re not abandoning you. We wouldn’t do that. My hope is you will do what I did, share the reality that we shared. Be change for the church. Bring change to the church. That is what God is calling us to do. If we don’t do that, we will fail to live up to what God has called us to be: Jesus with skin on to a lost and dying world. To a church that says, I don’t care what you wear or what you’re doing, just come home. We want at all costs for everyone and anyone to come home to the church.

8:41. We’re not going to control people anymore. We’re not going to tell them how to live. I am not the Holy Spirit. We are called to proclaim the truth of who God is. My beliefs haven’t changed, but there is nothing more important than winning people to Christ with the love of Christ.

8:43: Exodus became something it wasn’t intended to be. Exodus’s major failure is that it became a religious institution focused on rules of behavior, and not focused on what we believe. It’s time our message changed to be one of hope and love and grace. For these reasons that we believe it’s time for Exodus to close.

(He is now reading this statement. The room is utterly silent.)

(They have announced a new web site: Reducefear.org.)

8:48: Exodus has been like the ring in Lord of the Rings. While we have all been friends, there is something about Exodus that needs to be put to rest.

8:50: We fought the culture, and we’ve lost. But I think we lost for a good reason. It’s time for peace. We are the culture. Culture doesn’t exist without people. God doesn’t want us to fight people anymore. We believe it’s time for the church to open its doors and let the marginalized in. Let the spiritual refugees find a home in the church.

8:52: Ends with John 16:33.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Christ died to give you peace. The King is on the throne and you can trust him. We need to learn the serve. We must be a beacon of hope, and we must be different.

While this is a painful thing, something better is coming. There is more. This doesn’t negate our stories or what God is calling you to do. It’s just simply a new time. My prayer is that we have an amazing last Exodus conference. We have good news to share, and it’s time we shared the good news.

8:55. He’s now offering a closing prayer. It’s been one of the most remarkable, humble talks I’ve ever heard him give. This talk had none of the swagger of prior conference talks, but it was a confident one. At least that how it came across to me.

But make no mistake about it. This is the end of an era, and major milestone in the history of the ex-gay movement. I imaging we’re going to hear a lot of reactions over the next several days to come, but tonight, Exodus has come to a quiet and — dare I say it — a very dignified end.

First Impressions Ahead Of Exodus 2013 Conference

The conference hasn’t started yet, but I’m all signed in, badged, and already meeting friends from last year, which I guess is what happens when you become something of a semi-regular. I’m not sure there are enough people yet to get a sense of the “buzz,” but there are a couple of observations that I think I can go ahead and report.

First, this conference is greatly scaled back in size and scope from previous conferences. I asked one of the volunteers at the registration area how many people had signed up. She gave a number that was fewer than 300. I don’t know how many walk-ins would be expected, but it does seem to be shaping up into a much smaller conference than last year’s in St. Paul, Minnesota, where I think the attendance was somewhere in the 700 or 800 range (I can’t find the exact figure in my notes from last year). Clearly, some of the controversy surrounding Exodus’ change in messaging has had a significant effect.

Second, because the conference is seeing lower attendance this year, the schedule has been significantly re-organized from what had been originally posted online. The newly updated online program shows that Mike Haley, who had formerly been at Focus On the Family and was a regular speaker at Love Won Out conferences, had been scheduled to speak at a plenary session, but is no longer on the bill.

The printed schedule from my conference booklet (Click to enlarge)

Other changes to the schedule may still be in work. In my printed booklet, only one hour on Tursday and Friday is devoted to workshops, although this page (as of 5:00 p.m.) appears to reflect a much larger selection of workshops that had been originally planned. The blocks of time that had previously been set aside for workshops are now devoted to a set of forums, which I understand to be intended for a more open, interactive discussion rather than the more traditional lecture being given by a leader or guest speaker. Forum topics are “Let’s Talk Homosexuality,” “Sharing Your Story,” “God’s Created Intent,” “Embracing Your Story,” “Restoration and Forgiveness,” and “Empowering Your Story.” My booklet shows “Free Time” on Saturday from 3:15 to 7:00, but the online program says “SIGs, Refuge Groups.” I don’t know what “SIGs” are, but Refuge Groups are what they call the small group activity and discussion groups geared toward parents, men, women, young adults, couples, and students. I expect that tonight we’ll hear about more changes to the program schedule.

And finally, I’d have to say that Exodus president Alan Chambers’s apology has generated a lot of interest, both inside and outside the conference:

"@truthwinsout: Alan Chambers issues long apology to the LGBTQ community http://t.co/SSXYRESMod"//GOOD-BYE, EXODUS. #Sellouts #tcot #exgay

— Peter LaBarbera (@PeterLaBarbera) June 19, 2013

.@jeffchu @alanmchambers There have also been suicides. Alan's work destroyed people. Sorry is a nice, I guess, but it won't raise the dead.

— Dan Savage (@fakedansavage) June 19, 2013

@fakedansavage I'm an ex-ex-gay. "Sorry" also requires you stop what you're doing that hurts people and is wrong. Exodus hasn't stopped.

— Daniel Gonzales (@ColoradoGayDan) June 19, 2013

LaBarbera’s reaction, of course, is to be expected. It’s probably shared by those who are watching from Oklahoma City, where the rival, hard-core Restored Hope Network will begin its conference on Friday. But I think the reaction among many gay activists and ex-gay survivors will disappoint many of those attending the conference. I can’t say I’m surprised, nor can I say I’m disappointed at the reaction. I think it’s to be expected, actually. I don’t think just a single sorry has ever solved a problem, but if there is ever to be steps taken in that direction, it always begins with saying that word. And for more serious transgressions it will take saying it repeatedly, over and over, along with a resolve to fix what was broken to whatever extent may be possible. I think one of our BTB commenters put it nicely:

Although I am no longer a Catholic, it seems to me the concept of confession & reconciliation as taught by the Catholics is instructive here. When confessing an apology would be the beginning, not the end, of the reconciliation. Alan has expressed himself well here, but it will be his future actions that truly indicate whether he has really changed and is willing to do the hard work of making up for the hurt he has caused.

And finally, I think there will be a major announcement at tonight’s plenary session. I don’t know that for a fact, and I could easily be wrong about this, but I have a feeling that there’s going to be much more to talk about before the day is done. If I can live-blog it, I will.

Arizona group to put marriage back on ballot

Should the Supreme Court of the United States fail to make a broad ruling on marriage equality (and few think they will) a group in Arizona is getting ready to put the issue back on the 2014 ballot. (AZ Central)

If that happens, a new political group, Equal Marriage Arizona, will jump into action.

The group filed paperwork Monday with the Arizona Secretary of State’s Office to begin gathering signatures for a ballot initiative to redefine marriage as “a union of two persons.” The initiative also includes a clause stating that religious organizations or individuals cannot be required to officiate a marriage if they have religious objections.

The group’s co-chairs, Phoenix Libertarian businessman Warren Meyer and retired Tucson attorney Erin Ogletree Simpson, chairwoman of the Log Cabin Republicans of Arizona, said they will begin collecting the required 259,213 signatures as soon as the Supreme Court rules. They have until July 3, 2014.

The initiative has the support of former New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson, the Libertarian Party’s nominee in 2012 and the leaders claim that they have commitments for funding. They are currently looking for a Democratic co-chair.

Exodus International Issues Apology, Hints At Further Developments Tonight

Exodus International president has issued a far-reaching apology moments ago:

Recently, I have begun thinking again about how to apologize to the people that have been hurt by Exodus International through an experience or by a message. I have heard many firsthand stories from people called ex-gay survivors. Stories of people who went to Exodus affiliated ministries or ministers for help only to experience more trauma. I have heard stories of shame, sexual misconduct, and false hope. In every case that has been brought to my attention, there has been swift action resulting in the removal of these leaders and/or their organizations. But rarely was there an apology or a public acknowledgement by me.

And then there is the trauma that I have caused. There were several years that I conveniently omitted my ongoing same-sex attractions. I was afraid to share them as readily and easily as I do today. They brought me tremendous shame and I hid them in the hopes they would go away. Looking back, it seems so odd that I thought I could do something to make them stop. Today, however, I accept these feelings as parts of my life that will likely always be there. The days of feeling shame over being human in that way are long over, and I feel free simply accepting myself as my wife and family does. As my friends do. As God does.

Never in a million years would I intentionally hurt another person. Yet, here I sit having hurt so many by failing to acknowledge the pain some affiliated with Exodus International caused, and by failing to share the whole truth about my own story. My good intentions matter very little and fail to diminish the pain and hurt others have experienced on my watch. The good that we have done at Exodus is overshadowed by all of this.

Friends and critics alike have said it’s not enough to simply change our message or website. I agree. I cannot simply move on and pretend that I have always been the friend that I long to be today. I understand why I am distrusted and why Exodus is hated.

Please know that I am deeply sorry. I am sorry for the pain and hurt many of you have experienced. I am sorry that some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt you felt when your attractions didn’t change. I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents. I am sorry that there were times I didn’t stand up to people publicly “on my side” who called you names like sodomite—or worse. I am sorry that I, knowing some of you so well, failed to share publicly that the gay and lesbian people I know were every bit as capable of being amazing parents as the straight people that I know. I am sorry that when I celebrated a person coming to Christ and surrendering their sexuality to Him that I callously celebrated the end of relationships that broke your heart. I am sorry that I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine.

More than anything, I am sorry that so many have interpreted this religious rejection by Christians as God’s rejection. I am profoundly sorry that many have walked away from their faith and that some have chosen to end their lives. For the rest of my life I will proclaim nothing but the whole truth of the Gospel, one of grace, mercy and open invitation to all to enter into an inseverable relationship with almighty God.

I cannot apologize for my deeply held biblical beliefs about the boundaries I see in scripture surrounding sex, but I will exercise my beliefs with great care and respect for those who do not share them. I cannot apologize for my beliefs about marriage. But I do not have any desire to fight you on your beliefs or the rights that you seek. My beliefs about these things will never again interfere with God’s command to love my neighbor as I love myself.

You have never been my enemy. I am very sorry that I have been yours. I hope changes in my own life, as well as the ones we announce tonight regarding Exodus International, will bring resolution, and show I am serious in both my regret and offer of friendship. I pledge that future endeavors will be focused on peace and common good..

Moving forward, we will serve in our pluralistic culture by hosting thoughtful and safe conversations about gender and sexuality, while partnering with others to reduce fear, inspire hope, and cultivate human flourishing.

The bolding is original to the press release, which hints at a further announcement at tonight’s opening session of Exodus’ annual Freedom Conference being held at Concordia University in Irvine, California. I’ll be in attendance and will provide updates as soon as I can.

(In fact, I’m posting thus from my phone at a Subway just outside the campus before going in for registration. So please excuse any typos, autocorrect interventions and formatting problems. Also, if you’re in the area, give me a shout via Twitter at @jfburroway.)

Ex-Gay Leader Sentenced For Criminal Sexual Assault of Male Clients

Longtime pastor Ryan Jay Muehlhauser of Cambridge, Minnesota was charged last November with eight counts of felony, fourth-degree criminal sexual conduct in  case involving two adult males who came to him for counseling aimed at changing their sexual orientation:

Muehlhauser pleaded guilty to two of those counts Feb. 28. Under the plea agreement, Muehlhauser will serve 160 days in Isanti County Jail, remain on supervised probation for 10 years and register as a predatory offender. The other six counts were dismissed. Under state sentencing guidelines, a prison sentence can’t be ordered for fourth-degree criminal sexual conduct.

…Muehlhauser previously admitted in court that he engaged in sexual contact with two adult males. He admitted the sexual contact with one of the victims took place throughout October 2012 inside the prayer cabin located on the church property while he was providing spiritual advice in his role as pastor. He admitted to placing his hands on the victim’s genital area and suggesting the victim fondle himself.

He also admitted the sexual contact with the second victim occurred from March 1, 2012 through Nov. 4, 2012. He admitted to feeling the victim’s genital area and calling the sexual encounters “blessings.” He said he committed these acts for his own sexual gratification.

Both victims remain unnamed. One victim said that he met Muehlhauser at an event sponsored by Outpost Ministries, one of the ex-gay ministries that have joined the Restored Hope Network. Outpost director Nate Oyloe will be speaking at RHN’s convention this weekend. Oyloe also heads the Twin Cities House of Prayer, which has links to Mike Bicke’s Kansas City-based International House of Prayer, a movement which counts Lou Engle as among its most prominent adherents.

Andrew Comiskey Doesn’t Believe In Apologies

Exodus International’s annual “Freedom Conference” begins tonight at Concordia University in Irvine, California. The rival, hard-core Restored Hope Network network will begin what it bills as its second annual conference  at Cherokee Hills Baptist Church in Oklahoma City on Friday, with leadership meetings taking place today and tomorrow. Oklahoma City is home to Stephen Black’s First Stone ministries, which had been one of the founding ministries of Exodus International in 1976, and is also one of the founding ministries of RHN after leaving Exodus over disagreements with Exodus moving away from the “change” model.

Andrew Comiskey, who fired the first salvo against Exodus’ change in direction and is now RHN’s board chairman, is still furious, over a lot of things really — Kinky Boots getting a bunch of Tony Awards, the lesbian-themed film La Vie d’Adele getting top honors at Cannes (he calls it “a lesbian porn film”), and Exodus president Alan Chambers’s upcoming apology to former ex-gay ministry members who were harmed by their experience:

Yet the most disturbing deception for me was not played out on a 36-foot screen or on a Broadway stage or even in the fracturing of the Boy Scouts. It occurred in a church basement in Los Angeles, where Exodus head Alan Chambers gathered with a group of ‘ex-ex-gays’ to apologize to them for hurting them. With doubtless good intention that has now exposed itself as the deception that it is, Alan has sought to placate them for the last couple years.

I am troubled by Christians who now claim that God made them gay and cry victim at anyone who believes otherwise. Doubtless some have been treated heavy-handedly by churches or promised quick cures by homely, uninformed ministries. But instead of submitting their wounds to God and trustworthy healers, these ones allow bitterness to transform them into the most virulent proponents of gay identity and practice. And in Jesus’ Name and Authority! The wounded become deceived then deceivers.

These ones do not want friendship with Alan or Exodus; they want the demise of any ministry that claims transformation of persons with unwanted same-sex attraction. The sneak preview of Lisa Ling’s taping of the whole ridiculous affair demonstrated this beyond a doubt. One ex-ex-gay blasted Alan: “Exodus needs to be shut down—not tweaked, not improved, but shut down!” His demonized plea is becoming true as Exodus staggers along the untenable path of seeking to reconcile good with evil.

It’s important to remember that Comiskey, despite professing himself as a Christian, doesn’t believe in apologies. Several years ago, when Comiskey learned that a staffer at his Desert Stream Ministries had sexually abused at least one teenager under their “care,” Comiskey’s reaction was to complain about how horrible the entire affair was — to him. He griped about the police investigations and tangles with his liability insurance providers, but thanked his God that not a word of the sad affair leaked to the press. Comiskey has since converted to Catholicism, which knows a thing or two about sweeping sexual abuse scandals under the rug and dismissing its victims.