If You Think Your Parents Are Bad…

Timothy Kincaid

August 13th, 2007

Patrick Atkins knew that his family was judgmental and unaccepting.  And he knew that after 25 years together, Brett Conrad was the person he trusted to love, honor and cherish him.  But he did not know that he would suffer a ruptured aneurysm on a business trip which would leave him mentally impaired at the age of 47.

And so, like many gay couples, Brett and Patrick did not prepare the extensive and often expensive legal documents that would have given each other the protection and control over their own lives.  And now Patrick’s illness is a stark illustration of what can happen if legal protections are forgotten and family members are allowed to put their own biases above your happiness or care:

Conrad traveled to the Atlanta hospital to be with Atkins but was soon denied access by the family. Hospital staff defied the family’s wishes and let Conrad visit Atkins during off-hours.

Atkins eventually was moved to a nursing facility in Carmel, where Conrad would arrive after regular visiting hours so the Atkinses would not see him.

He filed his guardianship request in June 2005. That November, the Atkinses moved Patrick into their home and have since refused to let Conrad visit. They also have refused his phone calls.

It is inarguable that the Atkinses are cruel people. And their behavior cannot be justified. And, sadly, as long as gay couples are denied the easy remedy of marriage and instead are subjected to legal barriers and multiple forms, this story will repeat itself.

So each of us take a moment to ask ourselves if we trust those who have legal claim to us to honor and respect our lives. And if the answer is “no” then take the steps necessary to protect yourself from those who might believe that their dogma or bigotry can justify any level of cruelty.

(hat tip to reader David)

Kevin

August 13th, 2007

And what steps can legally “single” people really take that are ironclad when the statutes are still grounded in the 19th century and being reinforced by these bogus constitutional amendments “protecting” marriage?

The states treat legally “single” people as if they are permanent adolescents who are wards of their parents, then their siblings, and finally the state. Legally “single” people are essentially not considered adult enough to form their own “families” nor have their own meaningful relationships. To allow them legal status is exactly what the fundies scream about. . .

Jim Burroway

August 13th, 2007

My thoughts on this was “well of course, it’s partly their fault because they didn’t have powers of attorney, living wills, etc.”

But then I thought about Russell Groff and realized that even with a mountain of documents, estranged parents can tie partners up in costly legal knots for years.

Lynn David

August 14th, 2007

It is inarguable that the Atkinses are cruel people. And their behavior cannot be justified.

Their behavior can and has been justified in Indiana! I wonder if Conrad had the correct paperwork if Georgia would have given him proper just in the face of a legal assault from the Atkins family. I just see this as having gone bad for Conrad no matter what. I get the feeling the Atkins could have shopped for a judge who would have ruled in their favor.

David

August 15th, 2007

Thanks for the hat tip, Tim.

I invite all readers to contact national news outlets to strongly encourage them to cover this story. The more attention we draw to the cruely of the Atkins toward their son Patrick, the more likely they can be shamed into relenting.

To help encourage you to spread the news of Patrick and Brett’s plight, here are some of the comments left on the Indystar site by parents Jeanne and Tom Atkins’ supporters:

“He obviously deliberately chose his parents to serve in that capacity and not his fruity so claimed “friend”.”

“Homosexuals are like children. It feels good and they want it, so it MUST be right.”

“A fudgepacker can’t see his boyfriend and it makes the paper? Oh brother”

“The filthiness that is homosexuality is one of the greatest threats in todays society. I for one am glad to see that the family is doing the right thing by their son, and I support their Christian efforts fully. It’s a shame that so many of you think you know what is better for this man than his family. It’s not your business, or that gay guy’s business, it’s a FAMILY MATTER.”

Should the likes of those I’ve quoted above triumph, with the approval of the Indiana judiciary?

MAC

September 5th, 2007

Thanks so much for your coverage on this story. We have set up a website in an attempt to keep this story alive.
http://JusticeForPat.com

Tell your family and friends about this story. Things will only begin to change when the outcry from the public is too loud to ignore!

Leave A Comment

All comments reflect the opinions of commenters only. They are not necessarily those of anyone associated with Box Turtle Bulletin. Comments are subject to our Comments Policy.

(Required)
(Required, never shared)

PLEASE NOTE: All comments are subject to our Comments Policy.

 

Latest Posts

The Things You Learn from the Internet

"The Intel On This Wasn't 100 Percent"

From Fake News To Real Bullets: This Is The New Normal

NC Gov McCrory Throws In The Towel

Colorado Store Manager Verbally Attacks "Faggot That Voted For Hillary" In Front of 4-Year-Old Son

Associated Press Updates "Alt-Right" Usage Guide

A Challenge for Blue Bubble Democrats

Baptist Churches in Dallas, Austin Expelled Over LGBT-Affirming Stance

Featured Reports

What Are Little Boys Made Of?

In this original BTB Investigation, we unveil the tragic story of Kirk Murphy, a four-year-old boy who was treated for “cross-gender disturbance” in 1970 by a young grad student by the name of George Rekers. This story is a stark reminder that there are severe and damaging consequences when therapists try to ensure that boys will be boys.

Slouching Towards Kampala: Uganda’s Deadly Embrace of Hate

When we first reported on three American anti-gay activists traveling to Kampala for a three-day conference, we had no idea that it would be the first report of a long string of events leading to a proposal to institute the death penalty for LGBT people. But that is exactly what happened. In this report, we review our collection of more than 500 posts to tell the story of one nation’s embrace of hatred toward gay people. This report will be updated continuously as events continue to unfold. Check here for the latest updates.

Paul Cameron’s World

In 2005, the Southern Poverty Law Center wrote that “[Paul] Cameron’s ‘science’ echoes Nazi Germany.” What the SPLC didn”t know was Cameron doesn’t just “echo” Nazi Germany. He quoted extensively from one of the Final Solution’s architects. This puts his fascination with quarantines, mandatory tattoos, and extermination being a “plausible idea” in a whole new and deeply disturbing light.

From the Inside: Focus on the Family’s “Love Won Out”

On February 10, I attended an all-day “Love Won Out” ex-gay conference in Phoenix, put on by Focus on the Family and Exodus International. In this series of reports, I talk about what I learned there: the people who go to these conferences, the things that they hear, and what this all means for them, their families and for the rest of us.

Prologue: Why I Went To “Love Won Out”
Part 1: What’s Love Got To Do With It?
Part 2: Parents Struggle With “No Exceptions”
Part 3: A Whole New Dialect
Part 4: It Depends On How The Meaning of the Word "Change" Changes
Part 5: A Candid Explanation For "Change"

The Heterosexual Agenda: Exposing The Myths

At last, the truth can now be told.

Using the same research methods employed by most anti-gay political pressure groups, we examine the statistics and the case studies that dispel many of the myths about heterosexuality. Download your copy today!

And don‘t miss our companion report, How To Write An Anti-Gay Tract In Fifteen Easy Steps.

Testing The Premise: Are Gays A Threat To Our Children?

Anti-gay activists often charge that gay men and women pose a threat to children. In this report, we explore the supposed connection between homosexuality and child sexual abuse, the conclusions reached by the most knowledgeable professionals in the field, and how anti-gay activists continue to ignore their findings. This has tremendous consequences, not just for gay men and women, but more importantly for the safety of all our children.

Straight From The Source: What the “Dutch Study” Really Says About Gay Couples

Anti-gay activists often cite the “Dutch Study” to claim that gay unions last only about 1½ years and that the these men have an average of eight additional partners per year outside of their steady relationship. In this report, we will take you step by step into the study to see whether the claims are true.

The FRC’s Briefs Are Showing

Tony Perkins’ Family Research Council submitted an Amicus Brief to the Maryland Court of Appeals as that court prepared to consider the issue of gay marriage. We examine just one small section of that brief to reveal the junk science and fraudulent claims of the Family “Research” Council.

Daniel Fetty Doesn’t Count

Daniel FettyThe FBI’s annual Hate Crime Statistics aren’t as complete as they ought to be, and their report for 2004 was no exception. In fact, their most recent report has quite a few glaring holes. Holes big enough for Daniel Fetty to fall through.