What’s Best for the Children

Timothy Kincaid

September 29th, 2007

Anti-gays often justify bigotry with the claim, “I want what’s best for the Children”. This is generally played as some trump card intended to show that they are moral and superior and concerned about the interests of those who are weak and vulnerable and that gay people are selfish and hedonistic. This supercilious remark is trotted out for all sorts of nastiness from opposing family protections, banning adoptions, and censoring literature.

Naturally, much of the results of such bigotry serves to do just the opposite. It often causes hardships in the lives of real living breathing children – about whom anti-gay demonstrate little care.

One such instance is reported in the Utah Daily Herald. Utah has a law that requires those who adopt or are foster parents to either be married or to live alone. Oh, and gay couples cannot marry. It’s for the children, you know.

[Michael Valez and Michael Oberg] were surprised three weeks ago when the children’s birth mother [Valdez’ niece] asked them to take care of her children while she dealt with drug-related criminal matters. It was no small task, but they wanted to help, said Oberg. The kids are aged 11, 6 and 2 years, and 10 months. The children’s fathers aren’t able to take them, at least not now.

So the kids went to stay with their uncles and a cousin where they were known and loved and, though it was difficult, they could be together. But the state wants to take the children away from their uncle and put them in the foster system where they will most likely be broken up. At present a judge is allowing Valdez to retain custody of the kids, but it is against the wishes of the DCSF lawyer.

And those who support Utah’s anti-gay law that seeks to take these young children away from family members, break them up, and give them to strangers no doubt justify their callousness as being Best For The Children.


September 29th, 2007

If they cared what was best for the children, the suicide rate for g/l teens wouldn’t be anywhere near what it is now.


September 29th, 2007

Instituting laws banning adoption or fostering by gay people haven’t had anywhere near as much success as laws banning gay marriage at the state level (Florida being a glaring exception).

It seems everyday citizens as well as legislators understand how such arbitrary laws could be so wrenching to the affected children I am glad that the judge in this case had far more sense than the Department of Children’s Services.


September 30th, 2007

The attitude of the DCSF is disgusting. Just plain disgusting.

“To the state, it’s a simple matter of the law.” There isn’t even a pretense of caring about the welfare of the children! It’s all about moralizing against those who “cohabit.”

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