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S.J. Mercury-News Editorial Opposes Proposition 8

Timothy Kincaid

August 18th, 2008

San Jose is the third largest city in California and the heart of the Silicon Valley. And the San Jose Mercury News has joined the Los Angeles Times in opposing the anti-gay marriage amendment, Proposition 8. Their editorial opens thusly:

Of all the reasons people give for banning gay marriage – the purpose of Proposition 8 on the November ballot – the most difficult for us to fathom is that a marriage between two people of the same sex somehow diminishes the institution of marriage between a man and a woman.

Marriage is the most personal of commitments, and it already means different things to different couples. Some marry for love, others expediency. Some have children, others don’t, or couldn’t if they wanted to. There is no merit test; people marry despite histories of domestic violence, rape or child abuse. Why would couples determine the value of their own vows based on who else is allowed to take them?

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Paul Benedict
August 18th, 2008 | LINK

If gay marriage is so innocuous to the state’s view of the right to marry, then why do all marriage licenses now say “Party A” and “Party B.”

The law concerning gay marriage, as it now stands in California, completely abridges the constitutional right to marry. Marriage is now no longer marriage. The court of California did not “expand” the definition of marriage; it contracted that definition out of existence.

The institution of marriage, at its core can no more be damaged, than the right of free speech; however, governments, illegitimate governments, may attempt to infringe on these liberties. Anyone who votes in favor of the California court’s ruling is in favor of such infringements. The gay community has been befriended by the citizens of California; however, knowingly standing with tyrants may end such friendships.

Emily K
August 18th, 2008 | LINK

If gay marriage is so innocuous to the state’s view of the right to marry, then why do all marriage licenses now say “Party A” and “Party B.”

Because marriage is a contract between two parties.

Neil H
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

If gay marriage is so innocuous to the state’s view of the right to marry, then why do all marriage licenses now say “Party A” and “Party B.”

To paraphrase Jon Stewart: “Don’t you understand, people?! Gay marriage means we’ll have to change all the forms!!!

The stereotypical pencil-necked bureaucrat may believe that changing even a single word on their rigidly regimented stacks of forms to fill out really will bring about the downfall of Western civilization as we know it, but I think the rest of us can handle it.

Jason D
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

“The law concerning gay marriage, as it now stands in California, completely abridges the constitutional right to marry. Marriage is now no longer marriage. The court of California did not “expand” the definition of marriage; it contracted that definition out of existence.”

Open a dictionary, flip to any page, look at any word. You will find that just about every word in that book has more than one definition. Yet all those words exist. In fact if you look up the word “marriage” itself, it does have more than one definition, and that’s true even of those dictionaries that don’t include a definition for gays. The notion that marriage can only have one defintion, or not exist goes against logic and demonstrated reality. It’s hyperbole.
How many times do we have to go over this basic idea? There is more than one possibility, the existence of other options, other ways to live do not negate others.

“The institution of marriage, at its core can no more be damaged, than the right of free speech; however, governments, illegitimate governments, may attempt to infringe on these liberties.”

What right is being infringed upon? Free assembly? Freedom of the press? I see nowhere where this ruling is infringing on the rights of people to think and say what they please.

“Anyone who votes in favor of the California court’s ruling is in favor of such infringements.”

Again, what infringements?

“The gay community has been befriended by the citizens of California; however, knowingly standing with tyrants may end such friendships.”

Your definition of the word “befriended” defies common understanding of the word, what dictionary are you using?

Ben in Oakland
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

It’s the same dictionary that says that if gay people are no longer discirminated against, straight people lose, religious rights to discirminate are overturned, and that someone might actually have to open up his mind and THINK.

honey, if you can tell me one way my marriage yesterday affects yours– not in theory, not in the abstract, not in -if-gays-get-married-than-my-marriage-has-no-value-because-I-say-so, I would be willing to hear it.

As far as I can tell, since I don’t know you, you don’t know me, and we have nothing to do iwth each other, then you have no reasons.

Except the usual ones: I hate queers, my religion tells me to hate queers but we’ll call it love and hope no one notices the discrepancy.

Ben in Oakland
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

My friends were laughing yesterday at our wedding that despite getting married, I still found time to send TWO letters to the editor yeserday. Here’s the one to the mercury news:

Editor:

I am writing this letter on my wedding day. In a few hours, a minister will be pronouncing us “two men, united in love and marriage” in front of our dearest friends. It wil be one of the great days in our lives, as weddings usually are. Let me thank you for your wonderful gift to us, your editorial opposing Prop. 8. It is clear that you “get it” when it comes to gay marriage, and its benefits to gay couples, families, and society as a whole.

Our fear is that on Nov. 4, our legal marriage will no longer exist, though no one can dissolve the true marriage in our hearts.

To those who support Prop. 8 and oppose our marriage: we are both of us contributing, tax-paying, law-abiding and productive members of the community. We live active and positive lives, and are well thought of by family, friends, and colleagues. We live in peace with our neighbors. Why are our marriage, our equality before the law– indeed, our very existence– considered so threatening to you that you must pass a constitutional amendment to enforce your beliefs about marriage, family, or God’s will, and ensure that we have neither the rights nor the responsibilities that you take for granted?

How will dissolving MY marriage have the slightest effect on YOUR marriage, your family, your children? How would you like it if you had to ask 16 million registered voters for permission to marry your spouse? How would you feel if you came home one day and someone not your spouse informed you your marriage was over?

Rob
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

Congratulations Ben. Hope you and your spouse have many happy years together.

Ben in Oakland
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

Thanks, rob.

Timothy Kincaid
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

Ben,

Congratulations on your marriage. I hope it was an awe-inspiring, life-changing event.

cowboy
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

Details! I want details! Was it a Jewish Rabbi who performed the wedding?

And, more importantly, why aren’t you on your honeymoon?

Congratulations. If I knew you and your hubby better I would say: “You make a lovely couple.” But, from what I gather from knowing you from this blog, you make a lovely one-half of a couple at least.

Cherish the moment.

Ben in Oakland
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

thank you both. I don’t know if it was a life changing event, because in a real sense, it didn’t change much. but definitely one of the most important days in my life. I couldn’t stop smiling and laughing, except when i was crying. I only wish we could have done the big bang up thing I really want, but paul is in school and that will have to wait until next year. getting him to have 14 more people there was sturggle enough!!!! No honeymoon for the same reason until December.

Cowboy. No rabbi, but a friend of ours is a minister and was willing to do a non-religious service for us. It was lovely. We will post it on you tube when my best man gets back and can download it. I may put it up on my photo sharing site as well when i have time to edit them down.

We are actually a pretty attractive couple of middle aged men, if do say so myself. My words to Paul were these in brief): I love you for your integrity and honor, your generosity, and your willingness to listen and think and act upon what you have heard. I even love your stubborness, at least some of the time.

We went to a local oakland restaurant for dinner, and were well treated by the staff. the waitress told us she was very happy for us. she had friends hwo have been together for decades, and she was glad we hadt aken the step.

AJCanuck
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

Same-sex marriage (civil and religious) has been legal in Canada for over five years. While marriage rates have fallen in the grand scheme of things (meaning, over the past 50 years), in the past five years, the drop has virtually stalled, indicating that marriage itself is making a comeback. I hope and pray that Prop Hate falls flat on its face.

Samantha Davis
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

I find it interesting that Mr. Benedict calls gay people “tyrants” while openly insinuating that the state is an “illegitimate government.” I also find it interesting how he admits that the “institution of marriage” can “no longer be damaged” because, in his eyes, the government no longer recognizes “true” marriage before turning around and crying about how the same sex unions being recognized by the state harm “marriage.”

Oooooh, the double-think is killing me.

Ben in Oakland
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

Mr. Benedict has left the building. I wonder if he his asked his wife if their marriage has been defined out of existence by my marriage yesterday? Her response might be interesting.

Pomo
August 19th, 2008 | LINK

I hope all these endrosements help!

I attended a marriage rally the other day that cost $50. Money goes to EqualityCA to fight the amendment. Its not alof of money but when you get fired for being gay and can’t find a job, it was a big sacrifice…

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