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A sad loss

Timothy Kincaid

May 31st, 2010

Those who regularly read the comments sections will know the name Ephilei. We now learn some sad news from Ex-Gay Watch:

XGW is sad to report that Ephilei, whose real name was Johannah, has died in a car crash at the age of 26.

Johanna ran the website, a resource for transgender Christians and anyone looking for answers on gender and transgender issues.

We will miss her.



May 31st, 2010 | LINK

She truly will be missed.

Rest in Peace Ephilei.

May 31st, 2010 | LINK

I agree, her site was very well run, and she always had well thought out comments.

May 31st, 2010 | LINK

that’s so sad. i remember her posts, and i saw her website… i think she had a couple of websites, if i remember correctly. thought it would have been great to meet her in person some day.

she will be missed.

May 31st, 2010 | LINK

This is such a tragedy. My hurt truly grieves for the loss of such a young life. It almost seem unfair. Has there been any thought as to who will carry on her work now that she has passed away? I know that we’re all still in the schock phase of this, but she had a wonderful work among transgendereds and I think it would be a memorial to her life to be able to salvage those webpages and continue to make those resources available in the future.

Leonardo Ricardo
May 31st, 2010 | LINK

Very sad…peace be with her and her loved ones and dear friends.

June 1st, 2010 | LINK


Jim Burroway
June 1st, 2010 | LINK

I was very saddened to learn about this. I could always count on Eliphei to be the voice of reason and nuance. This comment she left in January on the importance of not issuing blanket accusations of bigotry toward those who disagree with us is typical of the kind of comments I looked forward do:

I think the disagreement among commenters comes down to what is correct and what is helpful. It is correct to call Osteen anti-gay and a bigot. But it is not helpful. Calling him Bigot, like Uncle Fred or Cousin Susan, we push him away from ourselves and our ideas and the human response is for Osteen to be insulted and upset. That in turn causes him to stop listening to us, to become less inclined to view our ideas favorably, cements his anti-gay views, and pushes him towards the more extreme anti-gay side of the spectrum. Those more extreme than Osteen complain “Gays label anyone who disagrees with them bigots” and we play right into their hands. That’s what happens when you’re hung on being correct.

Here’s what happens when you prioritize being helpful: Take small, realistic steps to bring the person to a pro-gay stance. Eg, first make sure they don’t believe in Iranian style executions. Dismantle the pedophilia link, etc. If they change their mind on just one issue, consider that a success. Continue conversations and have conversations that make the person want to continue talking with you. If someone calls me a bigot, I’ll stop talking to them, even if they’re starting to convince me. And realize that people minds don’t change on important subjects because of one blog entry or news piece. It’s a long process.

Thank you Johannah for your insight and thoughtfulness. “Rest in peace” seems somehow not quite right. “Be free” is more like it.

June 1st, 2010 | LINK

I’m so sorry to hear of this.

You will remain beautiful always, Johannah.

June 1st, 2010 | LINK

Very sad indeed. So young.. but she did accomplish much with her time.

June 1st, 2010 | LINK

Peace be upon her soul. May she be rewarded for her stand against injustice.

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