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Fascinating gay penis facts

Timothy Kincaid

July 18th, 2011

It appears that the National Institutes for Health helped fund the analysis of a survey about how penis size effects gay men. And this has the Traditional Values Coalition nearly sputtering with indignation.

Crazy Lou sent out a press release claiming that

At least $9.4 million for a 10-year study that included a survey of gay men to determine average penis sizes, “…to better understand the real individual-level consequences of living in a penis-centered society.”

Of course that wasn’t true. The funds were apparently but one tiny part of a larger grant and the purpose wasn’t to determine average penis size. Actually the findings included much more, such as: (Fox News)

The study reported, among its findings, that gay men with “below average penises” were more likely to assume a “bottom” sexual position, while those with “above average penises” were more likely to assume a “top” sexual position. Those with average penises identified themselves as “versatile” in the bedroom.

While previous studies have found that for heterosexual men, penis size was significantly related to comfort in a swimsuit, not much study of the penis was focused on gay men. And the researchers figured if anyone knew about penises, it was gay men.

And there was lots of fabulous info: the bigger the penis, the less likely to lie about it; smaller guys wish they were bigger, but no one wishes they were smaller. I have no idea how I missed this study when it ran in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.

But, seriously, there were some findings that are important. Those few (7%) who believed that their penis was “below average” fared significantly worse than other men on three measures of psychosocial adjustment. Also, men with above average penises were significantly more likely than men with average size penises to report having ever been infected with gonorrhea/Chlamydia/urinary tract infection.

All in all, what a great way to start the week. Penis fun facts and pissing off Crazy Lou.

And no. It’s none of your business.



July 19th, 2011 | LINK

Everything in the study was “self-reported.” From penis size to sexual history to health history to “psychosocial adjustment.”

I get that it’s a lot more difficult to actually test people’s blood and pull their medical records and find out about their work histories, never mind measure their penises, but still — why should we trust anything in these kinds of studies?

And the “psychosocial adjustment” element bothers me. I mean, look at the “prevention/promotion” scale part of the study. It seems based on 1970s-style thinking. The kinds of people who are happy to make pronouncements like “Think positively!/Put on a happy face!” would be rewarded in a study like this, while those people who resist the constant Oprahification of the world are deemed “maladjusted.” Is it really such a bad thing if a person worries about the man he might become in the future? One might posit that such a worry could serve a useful function, steering him away from weaknesses that he ought to resist.

I guess the study is kind of funny. Amusing. But it seems to provide yet another example of how social science is all headline and no article. The more you examine the details, the less you realize there was to it all. There’s no there there.

July 19th, 2011 | LINK

My smaller dick has always negatively impacted my self-esteem is this size oriented gay culture.

July 19th, 2011 | LINK

@Mark – It’s not just gay culture, which does not exist in some hermetically sealed vacuum bag. It exists within a larger hyper-sexualized culture (complete will unbelievable contradictions). You don’t imagine straight men endure the same thing. The old axiom about size not mattering is generally accompanied by a wink of the eye.

Richard Rush
July 19th, 2011 | LINK

This is going to be quite a sizable story, and you can be sure that all the usual small-minded men who loom large as members of the “pro-family” crowd will want to see it milked for as long as possible.

As little Peter Labarbera tries to get to the bottom of this big juicy story, you just know he’ll be moaning about it for days.

And of course, Bam Bam Barber will eagerly jump on it, but he knows that, to stay on top of the story, he’ll need to dig deep in order to measure up to the other pro-family giants who want to be on top, too.

And then there is Bryan Fischer. His big mouth will be all over this story. He’s particularly versatile in his ability to take the smallest or largest juicy nugget and turn it into rapturous ecstasy for himself and his audience.

But don’t despair. We need to maintain a measured response. In the short-run our opponents may score a little, but in the long-run we are winning big.

Remember, “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.” —– Martin Luther King, Jr.

Ben in Atlanta
July 19th, 2011 | LINK

Do you guys and gals ever check your spam filters? It seems to me that everyone is obsessed with dick. Every day there are emails from on-line pharmacies with best prices for hard-on pills.

If anyone starts in about that subject, laugh at them.

You really can’t miss the dick jokes in our own responses.

Yes, there is one down there somewhere. Penis, penis, penis.

Here’s some TMI. I recently found out my old-man wood still works without chemical assistance. It was totally inappropriate and embarrassing. It was also funny as hell.

July 19th, 2011 | LINK

I was wondering if someone would study the correlation of the size of the tires on someone’s 4×4 truck and their dick size. It has been suggested it is an inverse ratio.

(Mr. Rush…do you write scripts for porno videos?) :-)

July 19th, 2011 | LINK

Aww, don’t be shy, Timothy. Just a pic, baby!

July 19th, 2011 | LINK

If Mr. Rush does *NOT* write scripts for porn videos, he *SHOULD*! I found what he wrote absolutely hilarious!

Paul J. Stein
July 19th, 2011 | LINK

I wish my penis was a little bit smaller. It would open up a lot more opportunities and save a lot of complaining.

July 19th, 2011 | LINK

the 50’s gay joke was the homosexual lamenting that he hated 2 things; size queens and small dicks. his was typical 50’s gay humor.

Richard Rush
July 20th, 2011 | LINK

Paul J. Stein: Well played. Sneaking in the back door is always a subtle way to boast about impressive attributes.

Arthur: That 50’s gay joke had plenty of staying-power. I remember hearing it well into the 70’s.

Ben in Atlanta
July 20th, 2011 | LINK

I’m going to let my inner dirty old man out for a minute.

If you run across someone greedy you can always keep a “Tool”box in the bedroom and make it part of play. I like a literal red one. You can always ask “How big do you want it”?

Shame is for suckers.

July 20th, 2011 | LINK

I love that although, by definition, 50% of men have a penis of below average size, only 7% in this study reported that they do.

You got to love men. My only surprise is that it was a whole 7%.

July 21st, 2011 | LINK

They had to do a study for this ? So basically 10 million $ for someone to ogle other men for a decade – whoever awarded this grant should be executed

July 22nd, 2011 | LINK

I find it interesting that they say the study reports that guys with, ““below average penises” were more likely to assume a “bottom” sexual position, while those with “above average penises” were more likely to assume a “top” sexual position”
In all my experiences, I’ve never noticed that to be true. In fact, I’ve met so many well endowed bottoms as to believe the reverse to be true.

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