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A lesson in wedding photography

Timothy Kincaid

February 17th, 2013

Sometimes discrimination doesn’t come from a place of hate. Sometimes it just comes from a place of fear or confusion, an automatic reaction based on the established prejudice of the dominant culture. This weekend, we had an illustration of just such an event.

Photographer Anne Almasy decided it was time to take out her first advertisement, and she chose Weddings Unveiled as the magazine she felt best suited to reach potential clients. And although Anne has take pictures from many different weddings, big and small, she decided to stand out and be unique. She chose a picture from a same-sex wedding in which the brides were in a warehouse sitting on bags of coffee beans. She says it represents love, home, and joy, but I think it also is creative, interesting, and outside the box.

The response was not positive. The editor called her and said,

Is there possibly another photograph you’d like to use in your ad? We just don’t feel comfortable publishing an ad featuring a same-sex couple. These aren’t our personal beliefs, of course, but, you know…

Over the weekend, the magazine heard from a few folks who were not particularly pleased by that decision. And today they have a new perspective.

Honestly, we knew that everyone would not share our belief that all people have the right to marry. The issue is very sensitive and it is also very divided. We knew that it was possible that people would be offended if we published the ad and we knew that it was possible that people would be offended if we did not. We are so sorry that we acted out of fear and uncertainty. We had never been faced with such a decision and we should have acted with our hearts.

Yes, they should have. They made a hasty, fearful, and stupid decision. And now they are apologizing in a way that appears to me to be sincere.

I hope we are all able to see this as a learning situation, a reminder to our friends that friendship requires more than just “supporting” our community in theory or words, and a reminder to our community that sometimes people make mistakes but can grow if we let them.



February 18th, 2013 | LINK

I look forward to the day when people’s first reflex is to err on the side of fairness and justice and not on the side of not wanting to piss off the bigots.

Ben M
February 18th, 2013 | LINK

While their initial reaction left much to be desired, they offered a real apology, not the “I’m sorry you felt offended” apology. That is by itself a positive sign!

February 18th, 2013 | LINK

TampaZeke, I’m loving your comments lately.

San Diego Rob
February 20th, 2013 | LINK

I was more offended at the fact that they were sitting on a bunch of coffee.

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