Utah Republican Lt. Gov. Apologizes to LGBT Community

Jim Burroway

June 15th, 2016

Utah’s Republican Lt. Governor Spencer Cox gave a surprising speech during a vigil in Salt Lake City for the victims of the Pulse gay night club massacre. During the speech, he apologized for how he had treated gay people:

I grew up in a small town. I went to a small rural high school. There were some kids in my class that were different than me. Sometimes I wasn’t kind to them. I didn’t know it at the time, but I know now that they were gay. I regret not treating them with the kindness, dignity and respect — the love — that they deserved. For that, I sincerely and humbly apologize. Over the intervening years, my heart has changed. It has changed because of you. It has changed because I have gotten to know many of you. You have been very patient with me as I went through this change.

He also posed a very pertinent set of questions that he aimed to “the straight community”:

But now we are here. We are here because 49 beautiful, amazing people are gone. These are not just statistics. These were individuals. These were human beings. They each have a story. They each had dreams, goals, talents, friends, family. They are you and they are me. And one night they went out to relax, to laugh, to connect, to forget, to remember. And in a few minutes of chaos and terror, they were gone.

I believe that we can all agree we have come a long way as a society when it comes to our acceptance and understanding of the LGBTQ community. … However, there has been something about this tragedy that has very much troubled me. I believe that there is a question, two questions actually, that each of us needs to ask ourselves in our heart of hearts. And I am speaking now to the straight community.

How did you feel when you heard that 49 people had been gunned down by a self-proclaimed terrorist? That’s the easy question. Here is the hard one: Did that feeling change when you found out the shooting was at a gay bar at 2 a.m. in the morning? If that feeling changed, then we are doing something wrong.

…And so may we leave today, with a resolve to be a little kinder. May we try to listen more and talk less. May we forgive someone that has wronged us. And perhaps, most importantly, try to love someone that is different from us. For my straight friends, might I suggest starting with someone who is gay.


Here is the full transcript of Lt. Gov. Cox’s speech:

I’m vey humbled and honored to be here with you tonight. I’m supposed to be in Millard County tonight about a hundred and fifty miles away, but this was too important when Jim asked me to come. I almost never write what I’m going to say. But tonight, about an hour ago, I sat down and the words just came and so I wrote them. And so I hope you’re allow me to read these.

Thank you for being here tonight on this very solemn and somber occasion. I begin with an admission and an apology. First, I recognize fully that I am a balding, youngish, middle-aged straight, white, male, Republican, politician, with all of the expectations and privileges that come with those labels. I am probably not who you expected to hear from today.

I’m here because, yesterday morning, 49 Americans were brutally murdered. And it made me sad. And it made me angry. And it made me confused. I’m here because those 49 people were gay. I’m here because it shouldn’t matter. But I’m here because it does. I am not here to tell you that I know exactly what you are going through. I am not here to tell you that I feel your pain. I don’t pretend to know the depths of what you are feeling right now. But I do know what it feels like to be scared. And I do know what it feels like to be sad. And I do know what it feels like to be rejected. And, more importantly, I know what it feels like to be loved.

I grew up in a small town. I went to a small rural high school. There were some kids in my class that were different than me. Sometimes I wasn’t kind to them. I didn’t know it at the time, but I know now that they were gay. I regret not treating them with the kindness, dignity and respect — the love — that they deserved. For that, I sincerely and humbly apologize.

Over the intervening years, my heart has changed. It has changed because of you. It has changed because I have gotten to know many of you. You have been very patient with me as I went through this change. You even helped me learn the right letters of the alphabet in the right order even though you keep adding new ones. You have been kind to me. Jim Dabakis even told me I dressed nice once, and I know he’s lying. You have treated me with the kindness, dignity, respect, and love that I very often did not deserve. And it has made me love you.

But now we are here. We are here because 49 beautiful, amazing people are gone. These are not just statistics. These were individuals. These were human beings. They each have a story. They each had dreams, goals, talents, friends, family. They are you and they are me. And one night they went out to relax, to laugh, to connect, to forget, to remember. And in a few minutes of chaos and terror, they were gone.

I believe that we can all agree we have come a long way as a society when it comes to our acceptance and understanding of the LGBTQ community (did I get that right?). However, there has been something about this tragedy that has very much troubled me. I believe that there is a question, two questions actually, that each of us needs to ask ourselves in our heart of hearts. And I am speaking now to the straight community.

How did you feel when you heard that 49 people had been gunned down by a self-proclaimed terrorist? That’s the easy question. Here is the hard one: Did that feeling change when you found out the shooting was at a gay bar at 2 a.m. in the morning? If that feeling changed, then we are doing something wrong.

So now we find ourselves at a crossroads. A crossroads of hate and terror. How do we respond? How do you respond? Do we lash out with anger, hate and mistrust. Or do we, as Abraham Lincoln begged us, appeal to the “better angels of our nature?”

Usually when tragedy occurs, we see our nation come together. I was saddened yesterday to see far too many retreating to their over-worn policy corners and demagoguery. Let me be clear, there are no simple policy answers to this tragedy. Beware of those who say they have the easy solution. It doesn’t exist. And I can assure you though this: that calling people idiots, communists, fascists or bigots on Facebook is not going to change any hearts or minds. Today we need fewer Republicans and fewer Democrats and more Americans.

But just because an easy solution doesn’t exist, doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t try. The greatest generations in the history of the world were never innately great. They became great because of how they responded in the face of evil and terror. Their humanity is measured by their response to hate and terror.

I truly believe that this is the defining issue of our generation. Can we be brave? Can we be strong? Can we be kind and perhaps even happy, in the face of atrocious acts of hate and terrorism? Do we find a way to unit, or do these atrocities further corrode and divide our torn nation? Can we, the citizens of the great state of Utah, lead the nation with love in the face of adversity? Can we become a greatest generation?

I promise that we can. But I also promise it will never happen if we leave it to the politicians.

Ultimately, there is only one way for us to come together. It must happen at a personal level. We must learn to truly love one another.

The Prophet Muhammad is reported to have said, “You will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another.”

Jesus said this: “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you. Do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you and persecute you.”

Now, you know a little something about hate. And you know a little something about persecution. But you also know something about loving, blessing and doing good. What our country needs more than ever is less politics and more kindness. If nothing else, as we can see here tonight, this tragedy has the potential to bring us closer than ever before.

And so may we leave today, with a resolve to be a little kinder. May we try to listen more and talk less. May we forgive someone that has wronged us. And perhaps, most importantly, try to love someone that is different from us. For my straight friends, might I suggest starting with someone who is gay.

I leave you with the words of Lyndon B. Johnson. They were spoken at another very sad time in our history, the death of President John F. Kennedy. He said this: “Our enemies have always made the same mistake. In my lifetime — in depression and in war — they have awaited our defeat. Each time, from the secret places of the American heart, came forth the faith they could not see or that they could not even imagine. It brought us victory. And it will again. For this is what America is all about.”

On behalf of the 3 million people of the state of Utah, We Are Orlando and we love you. And I love you.

da kremminator

June 15th, 2016

A Republican, a politician, and from Utah. And yet, a loving human being above all. Let the healing begin.

SharonB

June 15th, 2016

Wow! Kudos to him!

Ben in oakland

June 15th, 2016

I NEVER thought I would hear anything like this from a Mormon republican official in Utah.

I am impressed.

Jay

June 17th, 2016

Let’s not get carried away. There is nothing in his speech to make one think that he is prepared to do anything as a public official to ensure equal rights for gay people. This is, after all, a man who supported Ted Cruz, who has vowed to make Supreme Court appointments to insure that Obergefell is reversed, and who viciously attacked transgender people until it became obvious that those attacks backfired even in conservative states.

Cox promises to be kind. He will no doubt smile as he twists the knife in our backs.

He is simply one of those bigots who profess to hate the sin but love the sinner. He thinks that he can work to deprive gay people of equal rights, but do so by professing his love for us and, thus, we won’t mind so much. Like so many of these nice Mormon boys, he suffers from a peculiar brand of chutzpah: he wants to strip away our civil rights but also desperately wants us to think well of him. Not only does he want to hurt us, but he wants us to say what a fine person he is as he does.

Keep an eye on what he does, not what he says.

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